That Feeling.

idk!

I didn't know if i could tell you this but i wasn't feeling really lovely all the time you weren't around. i didn't know if i had to tell myself that you did not care or if i should have just let it be cause i knew neither were you having the best time of your life. i didn't know if i could go on any longer than i already am. I don't know if i could take it any longer. It keeps hurting but idk where, something seems to bother me but idk what. i cry randomly but idk why. i think about the most random things and then start to breakdown thinking thats how things are. you talk rudely to me as youre going through something but i think its me i think its about me and i did something wrong. i dont know if u want me out of your life or if ure just irritated.i wonder if youre just annoyed by me or if ure not actually thinking about me. i wanted to leave everything and go away but ik im not helping anyone by doing something like that besides lets be honest im more of a coward to do that than actually wanting to leave if there was a way i could go away without me actually doing it if only there was some way i didnt have to cause a big mess.