Until I Die ?

Prolouge

(Unknown POV)

It's all my fault.

 The entire music room was filled with silence as I walked in, I almost chuckled at the thought of the numerous memories here. It feels like yesterday, I was here with him, we were so much in love, admiring each other's beauty and flaws with the promise of being in love with each other... forever. It feels like yesterday I was here with the most important people in my life creating memories, they were who made me realize how beautifully imperfect life could be, it was them who taught me that we should live in the days, instead of spending them.

But looking back now makes me realize how stupid I was to ruin all that I had. It was all me, I am the reason for my best friend being in a coma today. I am the reason that her boyfriend is in a wheelchair today. And worst of all, I am the fucking reason for the love of my life being in the ICU, battling death that would've never reached him if it wasn't for me. 

I am at that point in life, where I wonder why am I the one least harmed when it was all my mistake ? Why the fuck am I discharged just with a cast, while all of them are suffering for my wrongdoings? It was me. Every tragedy is because of me. It's all my fault.  None of this would've happened if I was never in their lives, they would've been way better without me. 

I stared at the piano as all the moments we spent together came flooding into my mind. Everything was so... perfect. Then why did all this happen? Why were all my wishes granted and then snatched away this harshly from me? Why does this happens to the people I love? Is this because I don't deserve to be loved?  Is this a forewarning that no one should come close to me?

As I was adjusting myself on the stool in front of the piano, I felt tears racing down my cheek. Without even making an attempt to wipe my tears, I trace the keys on the piano and close my eyes. The instant I close them, a familiar tune begins to play in my head and his face replaces the darkness in my vision. My eyes jerk open even before I could have a chance to meet those oceanic eyes of his. Those eyes never failed to encapsulate me. His eyes...  

Before I could even have another thought, I felt the tears racing down my cheeks and I began to cry harder than ever. Hah! This is what I've always been! A fucking crybaby... All I can do is cry and get people in trouble! I really don't deserve to live... The doctors said it's difficult, both of them are in a critical state. But even if they survive, how will I ever be able to face them? 

No. I won't face them ever again. Especially him. I should end my life here and that would be the best decision I'll ever be able to make... So it's decided then. I'll die here and maybe then they'll be able to continue their life happily, without any bootless interruptions in their lives. My eyes roam around the room and I spot a plant in a glass bottle... I rush there and firmly pulled out the plant and hit the bottle harshly on the wall, it broke into several pieces and I picked up one from the ground. The tears never stopped flowing down and now my hands were soaked too in an attempt to wipe the tears, all of a sudden I started feeling dizzy. My vision began to blur and my legs gave up, the piece of glass that I had lifted before fell from my hands and my knees stumbled, I gave up on trying to stand and waited to hit the ground. But the impact never came, instead, I felt cold strong arms holding me by my shoulders to help me stand. My vision was already blurred to the max but I still tried to get a look at my savior. 

Just as I was about to turn around, my body gave up. And suddenly all of it came back, everything, every single thing, started to replay from the beginning. This is where it all started and probably this is where it ends. 

"Claire!"

It was all I heard before slipping into complete darkness.