have a little faith | janthony

chapter one: fine

When you spend the first eighteen years of your life dreaming of something, you expect it to be completely all-consuming once it's in your reach. If a soulmate's love used to be the one thing you would do absolutely anything to have, why would you waste a single moment once you've found it? Jasmine, for one, was too sick of this pestering question to contemplate it any further.

Jasmine's life was fine. She found her soulmate on her eighteenth birthday, just like she was meant to, and has shared a life with him ever since. Every child dreamed of this. A soulmate was a promise of unconditional love for the rest of your days, a sense of completeness, and a partner you could always turn to with any troubles. But who do you turn to when your soulmate is the source of all those troubles?

Jordan was fine; nothing more, nothing less. He'd lit up like a sunflower in bloom when Jasmine showed up on his doorstep. They confirmed their matching marks, the word "faithful" written across their collarbones, and he has gone through all the proper motions since. He showers her with affection and gifts, muses about how fulfilled he feels with her, and speaks dreamily about the bond they share.

So she really is fine. She has a soulmate who loves her, so what does she have to complain about? One day, she believes she'll surely grow out of this, but for now she's haunted by a sense of uneasiness in her gut. Perhaps she just hasn't mastered the soulmate thing yet, or perhaps she hyped it up too much throughout her childhood. She just hasn't felt the earth-shattering, ethereal fireworks that are meant to accompany a soulmate's love. This was real life, not a fairytale, after all. Regardless, the universe didn't make mistakes with soulmates, and Jasmine was compelled to stay true to the word emblazoned on her collarbone.

"Faithful" wasn't just the lettering that inextricably linked her to Jordan; it was a rule to live by. All the love that enchanted her young mind and built over the years was destined for him, and to dream otherwise would be recklessly defiant. It didn't matter that, on her way out the door to meet her friend for coffee, the kiss she pressed to his cheek had felt like a chore.

That sense of a burden didn't phase her anymore, so by the time she arrived at the coffee shop where she'd meet her friend Emmy, it was out of mind. Yet another reason not to complain, Jasmine's friends were a perfect reason to get out of the house even when she wasn't working. She'd known Emmy since preschool, and her soulmate Daveed had joined the family as soon as they were all eighteen.

When Jasmine walked in, her friend's beaming smile and tight hug cleansed the murky feeling from her mind. All she had to focus on were the pastries and latte waiting for her on the table, mutual complaints about their jobs at the bar, and the vacation plans Emmy gushed over. Though after a while, whatever words her friend had been saying trailed off, as her cheeks puffed up and a little giggle slipped from her lips.

Jasmine raised her eyebrows and smirked at her friend who had clearly gotten lost somewhere far away. "Yo, Em? You still with me?" She nudged at her friend's arm until she found Emmy's eyes again, then laughed while the flustered girl shook away whatever clouds had come across her vision.

"Sorry, yeah, my bad," Emmy mumbled, feeling her cheeks burning with an innocent combination of embarrassment and love. "It was just D."

Daveed and Emmy found each other the day Emmy had turned eighteen, as a melody rang through their bond at midnight. The song roused them both from sleep, and Daveed took an overnight train to meet her before the sun rose the next morning. They had nearly forgotten to check for their matching marks, "luna" on their left ankles, because the warmth and love and safety that filled the room as soon as Daveed entered had left no room for doubt.

"What do you mean? Where'd you go?"

"He's in the studio now and was just.. thinking about me I guess. He was feeling all lovey and stuff." She tried to to bite down the smile that crept across her face, but her eyes betrayed her, revealing a type of joy Jasmine couldn't recognize.