I Am Who? - Book 2

Chapter 32 - Truth

It was dark. For the first time in what felt like forever, no visions flashed before my eyes, but I felt as if I weren't in control of my own body just as though I was trapped within a dream. Chills ran the length of my spine, and sucking in a sharp breath, I sat bolt upright.

Soft, yellow late-afternoon sunlight danced across my face, blinding me momentarily and driving back the darkness. I was on a bed, and across the room from me, a large window was open, emitting a delicate breeze that brought with it the scent of recent rain and cut grass. Dust motes danced on the sun rays streaming through the window, and the overpowering grip of the chill, which had threatened to master me in the darkness of my mind, faded.

Despite its recession, however, it left the horrid memories of its presence behind, and I shuddered and drew a deep breath, shifting my position slightly only to find that one of my arms was held down by some weight. Turning, I found myself looking at Kotaro's sleeping form. His hand was wrapped around mine, and exhaustion must have overcome him while he sat beside me as I slept.

Lying there, he looked so peaceful and calm, and for a moment, I forgot my demons. I moved carefully to get a closer look at him. Staring at his features, I wondered how I had never noticed how long his dark eyelashes were.

Unable to stop myself, I reached over with my free hand and brushed the hair off his brow. His eyes fluttered open immediately at my touch, but he didn't move. Motionless, we locked eyes, and I found myself wishing time would stand still.

"How do you feel?" His voice was raspy and sleep-tinged.

I nodded and gave him a weak half smile, somehow feeling as if something bad would happen if I opened my mouth to speak.

"I think we need to talk about some things." He sat up slowly, but his hand didn't leave mine.

Beneath his piercing gaze, I felt like a young child who has been caught with a hand in the cookie jar. My memories flooded back to life, and I turned my eyes toward the thick blankets covering me, chewing on my lower lip. I didn't know how to explain what had happened earlier, and admitting that seemed to put me in a sort of vulnerable position that I wasn't sure I wanted to be in.

Knowing I wasn't in control of my fate and what might happen to me and saying as much to someone else were two entirely different things. Truth be told, I was afraid of all of...whatever it was within me, and deep down inside, I couldn't bear the thought that I might scare Kotaro as well.

The dreams were one thing—and there was no mistaking the fact that they made me odd—but this...The darkness that I had unleashed, that had almost taken control of me for good, it was another matter entirely. I had felt it lurking beneath the surface, waiting for the chance to escape for a long time, but now that it had spilled over, I was terrified that if we talked about it, Kotaro would leave, and facing it all on my own was nothing short of nightmarish.

"You should eat first, though." Kotaro rose and stretched without noticing my hesitance to look at him.

He turned his back, and I chanced a glance at him. He was barefoot and wore only a thin, black shirt and a pair of black pants. It was strange seeing him without his travelling apparel and assortment of weapons, but I couldn't help feeling as though domestic life suited him...suited us.

Opening the door, he shot me a glance, and I looked away quickly, a hot blush staining my cheeks. A heavy exhale of breath that could have been a shielded laugh met my ears, followed by a whispered conversation. I barely paid attention to the exchange, however, as the truth began to settle into my mind. Domesticity would never be in the cards for either of us, would it? We'd been delt the wrong hand from the start, and there was no way to rewrite Fate's story now.