Devotion

01| i despise her.

"We don't have time for your evil looks, James, we have to work"

"For the last time, don't call me James."

I strutted down the stairs while my brand new shoes made a disgusting noise, which stopped everyone briefly in their movements. "So what exactly are James and I doing in this small town? And why doesn't Sam do that with me? " Darcy looked at me pityingly and then continued. She knew that working with Bucky made me nervous, more than anything.

Since Steve left there was nothing that Bucky and I had in common and that was probably something that Bucky felt more than I did, because he ignored every message and call from me since then.

"Sam is somewhere else right now and you know that too. We can't pull people out of missions just because you two don't want to confess your love for one another. "

Bucky's arm twitched and for a moment I thought he was going to attack Darcy.

"I don't love her, I despise her."

That was the punch in the face. Suddenly everything stopped, no one was even breathing and my mouth opened slightly, then I closed it again.

"Will you please leave us alone for a minute?"

With a few nods and sad faces, we were alone seconds later.

"What the fuck James."

He didn't look at me, just stared at the ground while wiggling his feet back and forth.

"Why did you say that?"

"Because it's true. Bring the others back in and let's do this mission before I don't want to anymore."

I shook my head and bit my lip. it was like every single cell in me was starting to vibrate.

"It's about Steve, isn't it?"

Silence. Even the wind became quiet for that moment, until Bucky finally let go of the edge of the table, which he was gripping so hard, and came closer with quick steps.

He grabbed my neck, his thumb pressed tighter than any other finger, and his brow furrowed.

"You could have stopped him, but you didn't and now ..."

A tear flowed from his eye, slowly and sadly when he finally let go of my neck, watching me catching my breath.

"And now I'm alone, alone with nightmares that haunt me every night, so tell me y / n how am I ever going to look at you again without hating you?"

I swallowed and looked away, because his painful eyes burned a hole in my heart.

"I'll bring the others back in."

I turned, still without looking at Bucky, and walked out of the room. My steps felt heavy, like I had tons of weight on my feet, shoulder, and heart.

"Come in, we agree, we'll go to the hex today."

The Hex was a city that was in a different reality than ours, we were unsure how it was created and why Wanda and Vision, an actually dead Avenger, were also there. But we only knew that we had to break this barrier and free the people.

"Are you all right?" Darcy whispered and put her hand on my shoulder.

"Yes, everything is fine, let's get started."

Everyone nodded and we went out of the base. I was particularly careful not to walk near Bucky, which of course could not be avoided in the long run.

"Y / n hey, listen to me"

I kept walking and ignored him.

"I didn't mean to attack you like that earlier, okay? It's just not that easy for me right now, and certainly not for you either. "

"Stop your bipolar shit and let's get this mission done Bucky."

With quick steps I left him behind without giving him another chance to apologize, simply because I knew I would forgive him otherwise.

When we got there faster than expected, I choked on my spit when I saw the huge red energy that was before my eyes.

"wow" I said and everyone else agreed with a low grumble.

"Let's go you two. Take each other's hand and finish this mission as soon as possible. "

Darcy grabbed my hand and put it in Bucky's hand, which caused him to look at me. I saw a glint in his eyes, if only for a moment, and when he squeezed my hand tighter, I felt it deep in my stomach.

"Hold on closer to me, we can't separate from one another"

now also holding his hand tighter, we looked at each other again before we stormed into the hex.