You don't love me.
And I must learn that's ok.
I'm not going to lie,
you are NOT worth it.
I won't hold back on my thoughts: I used to think you weren't pretty enough. What would people think of me with somebody like you? I'm not a goddess, but you are more like a gnome.
But what can I say? You won me over,
and in a matter of seconds.
Even with a boyfriend whom I very much dearly loved, you won me over.
Your attitude, your good vibes, how you could make me smile in my darkest days, how you would lift me up... Even if I had a cow on me, you would lift me with just one hand. I just can't stop talking about you.
In the beginning, I liked you because you looked like my ex. And that's the only time I have compared someone to him. To the person whom I have loved the most in this entire world. If it wasn't for him, I would have run to you and told you how I felt.
I know I am shy, and I will carry that weight with me for the rest of my life.
I should've been more forward.
For that, I am sorry.
But what for?
Humiliation?
I sent you multiple texts,
none of them got an answer.
I was there for you, I cared for you.
I was there when your grandfather died, when you had problems at work, when you didn't even know you were sad...
I was there for you, I cared for you.
You couldn't even ask me how I was on a normal day.
The answer is:
I was broke.
You answered my friend. But you never answered me.
And I just need to be ok with it.
I need to be ok with the fact that I fell for someone that I thought wasn't good enough for me, and I turned out not to be good enough for them.
I fell.
I fell hard,
and I didn't even want to admit it.
And for you.
But,
I was dumb.
I thought you liked me.
I was stupid enough to think you liked me. That you felt the same attraction.
But no.
I'm not blonde.
I don't have blue eyes.
I'm not her.
Because you were in love with my best friend.
