The Blues

Chapter FOURTEEN

The dinner was okay, apart from the fact that there were U.S. officials, discussing my future. Sam, and even Bucky were against the ideas they have proposed, even the queen was on my side. They were correcting my wrong doings.

I excused myself later on, and went to the impressive, palace bathroom. Tears were at bay. All I could think of was how much I wanted Bucky in that moment. He should have been feeling the same. Because he opened the bathroom door. "I thought something happened to you." He said.

"So you still care?" I said like a puppy.

"You've stayed here long, we were all worried, given your past. The queen told me to check on you, she knows our history."

"Oh. Okay, I'll be out in a minute." I said dryly.

"Okay." He didn't budge. He held my arm.

"Bucky, don't." I said. Anticipating what was going to happen.

"You have no right to look this tempting." I was surprised by that remark.

"I know you are angry at me. So I don't want this, not until we get back together." I looked at him, just to see him say the words. I expected him to say that we would.

He kissed me, he pulled Me in, and kissed me with frustration. I kissed him back like an idiot. It got too intense, and all of a sudden, I found myself on a bathroom stall. He bent me over and lifted my dress. I know it was coming out of a place that was full of anger. This was not compassion. Not one bit. "Stop." I said. He took it as "sexy talk " So I pushed him. He looked at me with lust in his eyes. It was the only thing in there.

I fixed my clothes. "Tell me when you want to communicate. Will you?" I said, out of breath. I slammed the door. He did not look over at me during the rest of the night. Sam escorted me to my room. "What's up with you and Bucky? for real?"

That is when I started crying. Uncontrollably, we went inside and I told him everything. And all he had to say on the matter was: "Bucky did the right thing."

"I should suffer the consequences." I said.

"No, you don't understand the diplomatic issues surrounding the serum. It is the property of the U.S. government. You'd be facing horrible consequences right now."

"I see."

"This is not Okay, what you did. By all means."

"I know."

"But we have to keep it as a secret."

"Okay."

"Come on, Ayla. Don't be so sad, you've done something wrong, but it is not the end of the world."

"I know, I'm aware. I'm just afraid of being past the point of redemption."

"If there is anyone who knows a thing or two about redemption, it is Bucky." He was right, once again.

"You should've gone out with me." He said, half jokingly.

"And would be an army wife, right?"

"What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing."

"I did not do this to be a superhero or anything, I don't know why I did it. I wanted to keep myself safe. I just did not want to wait to be saved. I want you to know that." I said.

"I'm beginning to notice that." He stopped and looked at me. "I gotta go." he said.

"Okay, alright. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ayla, stop worrying so much. You know he loves you."

I just pouted. I was not so sure anymore. I took my clothes off after the departure of Sam. Went into the shower. I missed him, I'm missing him. I just want him back, that's all.
Depriving me from himself was the worst of punishments.