Do’s & Don’t’s
Tell her she is beautiful, even if you think she is only pretty. Come on, you know how it’s done, for God’s sake. You look into her eyes, you look at her lips ( girls find this quite appealing ), back to her eyes ( not the boobs, perv ) and, sounding as sincerely as you can, whisper to her: “You are so beautiful…”.
Very important, wait for her reply. Don’t just jump on her, you’re not an animal ( you’re somewhat resembling a pet, but that’s a different story ). WAIT. Judging from her reaction, you may understand what kind of girl she is. If she looks brightly in your eyes and says “Thank you”, you have a winner. Or a player. Beware. Or someone who is aware of her beauty. If she looks down, she may be either shy, unaware of her looks or plain ugly and she knows it.
Make it your life’s goal to make her feel beautiful. I don’t care if you have to give up your scientific career to become an actor ( or a politician ), but do so. This is the only way to make love to her. Make her feel desired, loved. Let her know that she comes first ( i’m so subtile,right?).
Clean yourself. Nobody likes the smell of yesterday’s or last night’s sweat, or what you had for breakfast or that you had to drink a beer or two to get the “kick”. Use plenty of water, plenty of soap, plenty of toothpaste or mints and just a little, tiny amount of perfume.
Groom yourself. Just shave the unwanted hair away, nobody wants to make love to Big Foot, they want to take him to a lab, or a zoo and stick needles in him and throw him food through the cage bars.
FORGET THE PORN! It’s not real. Stick to the “classics” first, until you get to know her and after that you can “try something new”.
Don’t and I mean, really, don’t wear anything ( underwear related) stupid. A pair of Spidey boxers? Kiss your making love good-bye and say hello to “sticky-hand”.
Those are for your already comfort zone, when you can actually role-play or make fun of it without looking bad.
If it’s your house, clean it. We don’t want to see you dirty underwear or God-knows-what sticking from under the bed.
If it’s her house, don’t be nosy. You can look into her bathroom cabinet, but without her knowing. Ask her questions, but if you reach a soft spot, STOP.
Be careful what you ask her or what informations you share with her. You can’t expect to make love to her after you’ve asked her if her dad cheated on her mom or after you’ve told her that you just vomited in the trash can outside her door because you ate something bad.
Always have a little something called “condom”. BTW, practice with it before, especially if you’re a virgin. We find it a personal offence if you struggle with it for more than 2 minutes. If you do it well the first time, who knows, maybe we’ll help you next time.
Don't be offended by the content. I've experienced all of those "accidents" so i know what it's like.
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