Alastor's Game is one of my comfort songs, although i've never watched hazbin's hotel, the song is deff a 10/10.
was it my name that was put together?
or was it that I'm desperate for validation?
why did I dance every night like my whole life depends on it?
why was I left scared?
was it because I wasn't enough for you,
mother?
or was it because I didn't turn out the way you wanted me to,
mother?
why can't you be satisfied with me,
mother?
when was it that the little girl realized that she wasn't what her mother wanted?
when did she realize that she doesn't know when her childhood started and ended?
when will she realize that her feet are bleeding?
how could I let myself share my art to anyone?
now they view me as an artist and only an artist.
why do they topple me with questions?
why are there so many eyes on me?
when did the little girl start feeling eyes on her wherever she went?
when did the little girl start thinking that every whisper or laugh was towards her?
she hates herself.
she's tired.
she can tell that she became what her mother hated the most.
did you birth me because you wanted a trophy,
mother?
are you crying because you weren't able to sculp your own perfect little porcelain doll,
mother?
are you sad because you're marriage didn't turn out well that you put pressure on her,
mother?
was it appropriate to do such things to the little girl,
mother?
are you looking at the once little girl and wonder, "what went wrong?",
mother?
she's tired.
someone help her.
she' scared.
someone protect her.
did you thought that you leaving your family for another one won't affect anybody,
father?
did you not like the aftermath of your reckless and childish flirting,
father?
did you take one look at the little girl and decide that you don't want her,
father?
did you think that leaving but not letting go was appropriate,
father?
letting the little girl watch other families being complete because they have their own fathers and making her insecure about her family's incompleteness due to the absence of a father and/or a father figure wouldn't hurt anyone right,
father?
why can't the girl trust anyone anymore,
tell me mother,
tell me father.
"what has become of the little girl?"
Sweetheart would ask.
"the little girl grew up too quickly.",
was always the answer that Darling would give.
because it is the only true answer there is in all of the stars in our universe.
anyways my country is going on total lockdown again.
I saw a post once from World Buzz that somebody who had covid escaped the hospital and later proceeds to go shopping with their fiance.
ppl these days, smh.🙄
anyways ignore the shittyness and just admire my effort in putting my feelings into work🤗
if you're anything like me you would know that writing about feelings is very challenging(‾◡◝)
- khaira
