Under Streetlights

PROLOGUE

"Tulala ka na naman."

I dropped the clipboard due to shock, I looked at Ambs before chuckling. "Sorry, just really hasn't–"

"I know, but he eventually has to know." Ambs smiled at me, reaching out to hold my hand across the table to keep me calm.

"Right.. right, I just feel so guilty." I chuckled to lift the atmosphere up.

Ambs sighed, "It's been almost five years, Indie."

Yeah, almost five years of hiding from him. And looking at this clipboard of names, my heart can't help but skip beats due to nervousness. What if he gets mad? Ambs always updates me about him, and according to her—from him, he's still unable to forget. I've scarred him, the person who desperately wanted to help me.

I'm sorry, my love. I was lost, I didn't know what to do. It all felt so heavy.

As Ambs was leaving because her boyfriend called for an emergency, she pecked my cheek before smiling. "You can do this."

I nodded with a smile as I watched her leave my office. A charity event of mine will start an hour from now, I have to go check on my employees. I smiled at the employees, thanking them for working hard before checking up on the children.

"Hello, what's your name?" I gave the child the warmest smile I could give.

"Ysa!" She gave me the brightest smile, I think she's around 3 or 4.

"We'll be serving food soon! Hintayin mo ha?" I smiled, patting her head as she nodded.

This event, made for children who feel as if what they want to word out is invalid. Children who are forced to stay quiet for that they have fear of invalidity. I want them to know that people, even the ones they aren't close with, are willing to listen. I want them to know that they're valid, what they have to say is valid. I don't want them to end up like me.

"Tol! Kanina ka pa?" I heard.

"Hm? No, not really. Kinda wish I came earlier though." I felt my body froze,

That voice..

He's here.

"Ladies and gentlemen, our CEO, Ms. Bellavia!" My eyes widened, caught off guard again. Fuck!

I rushed without running, smiling at the emcee as I stood tall on the stage as I thanked the lady before tapping the mic. Here goes nothing.

"Good afternoon, gentlemen, gentlewomen and children! Today, we gather in this event to help one another and remind oneself that we are valid, what we feel is valid and that you are strong, strong enough to stand up and fight for your rights." I blurted out.

"Please do know that.. kahit anong sakit pa 'yang nararamdaman niyo, it's valid. And when someone tries to help, don't push them away. Lift your head up, smile and tell them that you appreciate them. We don't want to hurt who wants to help, do we?" The children answered with a 'no po'. At this point, I was just reminiscing on my mistakes.

But as my eyes scanned through the crowd, my grip on the mic loosened up.. as my eyes met his.

His, whom I once left.

I could see the shock, sadness and confusion in his eyes. I looked away as I looked at the children instead, cutting the speech short before leaving the stage with a now, heavy heart.

I had the urge to talk to him, hug him, kiss him. But I just couldn't. So I built up the courage to make something up, and walk up to him to finally, hear his voice.

"Hello, Sir. Mind playing an instrument for us? I heard from one of your colleagues that you're amazing with instruments." I tried to sound calm, smiling behind him.

He then slowly turned to me as his lips parted, exhaling a little as if he had not breathed for the past seconds. Was that too scary of me to say?

He stood there, looking at me for a few seconds before his eyebrows furrowed, last noticing that his eyes.. were brimmed with tears that were threatening to fall.

"Bakit 'di ka lumaban?"