More than Nothing, Less than Something

Prologue

March 23, 2009

It was just a normal Tuesday. I was only a third grader, so there wasn't much to complain about. I was in the lunch line with my best friend, Angel.

We met at the end of the previous year because we were competing for the same award. That mentality was pretty much what got us close at the beginning of third grade. We competed at everything, but we were still the best of friends.

She seemed normal until I saw her play football and basketball with the guys at PE. She was better than most of us, and not very far behind the others. From then on, we were great friends.

Of course, we also argued a lot. Most of them were playful arguments though. We always seemed to be on opposite sides of everything. I'll even admit to purposely going against what she said sometimes just so we could debate.

It took a while, but toward the end of November I realized that I felt different about her than I originally thought. Despite my best efforts to get past it, I couldn't help liking her as more than a friend.

Being the 10 year old that I was, I really didn't know what to do about it. I was still supposed to be afraid of catching cooties from girls, but Angel made me think differently.

So today, I decided I was going to tell her how I was feeling. I didn't really know what to expect, but it seemed to me that she enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed hers.

While we were in the lunch line, I was attempting to have a debate with Angel about Brett Favre. I couldn't focus, though. I was too nervous about what I was about to do.

I got my tray and sat down in my usual spot. She sat down right beside me just like she does every day. My palms were sweating.

Too nervous for a speech like the ones they tell in the movies, I decided to just get it out. "I like you," I blurted out before I even got a chance to think about it.

The next part was by far the worst part of it all. I waited for a response, any response. All I got was a look. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was slightly open, most likely not knowing what words to form after my confession.

I have no idea what she would have said, but I bailed before she had a chance to respond. "I'm just kidding," I said with a half-hearted laugh. She laughed back and we never talked about it again.