Songbird

Prologue

Fly me to the moon
Let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On a, Jupiter and Mars
In other words, hold my hand
In other words, baby, kiss me
Fill my heart with song
And let me sing for ever more
You are all I long for
All I worship and adore
In other words, please be true
In other words, I love you
Fill my heart with song
Let me sing for ever more
You are all I long for
All I worship and adore
In other words, please be true
In other words, in other words
I love you.

My millionth attempt to record this song fails once again. For some reason, unbeknownst to me, I've trouble with the ending. It keeps coming out too forced for my liking.

"Okay. One more attempt." I tell myself. I turn my mic on again and start singing. The result isn't perfect, but it's definitely better than before.

Out of habit I peek out of my open window, which is where I'm sitting to record, knowing my parents will be coming home around this time. I expect to see their car parked or them entering the driveway, but instead I see someone standing on the sidewalk from across my home.

He is looking up at me with an open mouth and blood fills my cheeks that have started burning with embarrassment. My first instinct would be to look away and act like I didn't see the boy, but it's too late for both of us. We know we've seen each other.

From his choice of outfit I can tell he was jogging past my house and probably stopped when he heard me sing. He can't be older than me, but I haven't seen him before. Wellpegi Valley isn't exactly a huge town. Everyone pretty much knows everyone, so I guess he is new in town.

"You've a beautiful voice." He shouts unexpectedly. For a few seconds I don't know how to respond. I'm taken by surprise from the compliment.

"Thank you." I shout back, my voice cracking as I do. I clear my throat quickly and pray he didn't hear it. The dark haired boy smiles and nods his head, but he doesn't leave.

"Can I help you? Are you lost?" I ask, leaning forward.

"No. I was just passing by, and I happened to hear you singing." He explains running his fingers through his damp, sweaty hair. Even from a distance I can tell he has a cute face.

"Didn't know I had an audience. It's usually quiet around here. Not many people pass by, so it was kind of unexpected to see you." I say. This is so weird.

Usually I'm the last person to start a conversation with a stranger and suddenly here I am, talking to a cute boy from my bedroom window.

"Didn't mean to startle you." He apologizes.

"It's okay. You're actually the first person other than my family and friends who have heard me sing, so thank you for the kind feedback. I appreciate it." I say.

The boy smiles and I catch myself smiling back like an idiot.

"Good to know I had this privilege. I guess I will see you around." He waves before continuing his jogging.
"Yeah, see ya!" I say, waving awkwardly.
It gives me a chance to take a better look at his athletic built, or maybe I should say his toned behinds.

"Don't look at his butt, Riley." I whisper to myself.
"But it's a nicely shaped butt, right, Pepper?" I say, looking towards my half asleep deaf cat who responds with a yawn. I think she gives me a look of disapproval, but then again, Pepper always looks like someone stepped on her tail.

A little later, I close my window and hop in for a shower. It's the last evening of summer vacation before I go back to the hellhole called school. At least this is my last year there, and I plan to make it one to remember.

During the summer I had an epiphany and started working on myself. I still have a hard time getting used to my new thinner body. I was no longer the chubby girl, but still there are times when I look in the mirror, and she's still there.

Furthermore, I didn't starve myself or anything to get to where I am, but I do miss being able to grab that jar of Nutella from the pantry and digging in with a spoon late at night. I still do it sometimes to be honest.

Along with my new body, came new clothes. Things I'd never thought I'd wear now fit me perfectly. I pick my outfit for tomorrow, knowing I'll have to respect my school's dumb dress code.
For some reason, spaghetti straps are out of the question because shoulders attract unwanted attention? That's plain stupid in my opinion.

But I really want to wear my new spaghetti strap dress my mom got me the other day.
Unfortunately I have to pair it with a white t shirt on the inside for the dress code's sake. It doesn't that look bad, but I already know I'll be sweating like a sinner in church tomorrow. The heat hasn't been kind to us lately. Can't wait for fall to come, so I can wear my cozy sweaters.

A soft knock on the door lets me know that my parents are home. My mom's head peeks from behind the door.

"Oh sweetie, you look beautiful in it." She says referring to the dress.

"I feel good wearing it." I admit. My mom was my biggest supporter through my weight loss.
At first, she was afraid that I would develop some kind of eating disorder, so to prevent that she took me to a professional who set up a plan based on my body's needs.

"Big day tomorrow, huh?" She asks, making herself comfortable on my bed. It is a big day indeed. Not only will I show up looking like a different person. I'm signing up to audition for the lead singer of my school's choir.

At the end of each school year someone is set to sing during graduation. Only seniors are allowed to audition, though, and this year is my chance to do so.

"I'm nervous, not going to lie. I've never sung in front of other people. I'm afraid I'll freeze or something." I say sitting next to her.

"The more you think about it, the more it will stress you out. You've a beautiful voice, baby. You've got this." She takes my hand, rubbing the skin of my hand gently.

I ponder if I should tell her about the boy that accidentally heard me singing earlier but knowing my mom, she'll start integrating me for information about him that I don't even possess, so I don't mention him at all.

Typically, I'm not one to get attention from boys. Or at least I used to not get attention from them. It never really bothered me, to be honest, but there were moments in the past that I found myself a little jealous of my friends for getting guys while I stood there completely invisible.

After dinner, I find myself thinking of that boy again. It will sound weird but in moments like these weight loss has made me more insecure than I was before. Would that boy still talk to me if I looked the way I was before? Technically, he heard me before seeing me and my voice isn't any different from how it used to be. But I can't help but think of what if.

In the end I decide I don't have the time or energy to care about a random boy as my nervousness for tomorrow is at its peak. None of my classmates has seen me throughout the summer, we were away for vacation,, so I already know my weight loss will be throwing their attention to me. Not sure how to feel about that.

Not only that, but I will have to find the courage to sign up for the audition, which usually happens two weeks after school starts.

To help myself sleep I hum a random tune and scoot closer to Pepper who is as always asleep.

"Tomorrow will be great." I say to comfort myself