Maia

29

Word Count: 1032

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MAIA'S POV

The car ride was both awkward and silent as we all crammed into the small space. Alessandro ensured that I was in the passenger seat instead of being cramped in the back with the boys. I didn't dare speak to or look at any of them. I went straight to the car, wearing my clothes and still wrapped in a towel. The boys packed up rather quickly, which I was thankful for.

I was still trembling, fear coursing through me like an electric current. Memories surged back, overwhelming my thoughts with vivid detail, each one more distressing than the last. I could feel the weight of their concerned gazes on me - Alessandro's brow furrowed with worry and the boys exchanging puzzled looks, trying to gauge what was happening. I wanted to reach out, to explain the torment that gripped me, but the words felt trapped in my throat. I couldn't tell them. I couldn't speak a single word. I just couldn't summon the strength to share my burden.

As soon as we pulled into the driveway and I felt the familiar jolt of the car coming to a stop, I leapt out with a surge of energy, my heart racing with urgency. I hurried into the house, my mind filled with thoughts that needed to be shared and made a beeline for Papa's room. Despite the chaotic noise of my brothers calling my name from behind, I pushed the door closed with determination, shutting out the world for a moment.

I settled into the old wooden chair next to Papa's bed, looking down at him. He lay there, his expression calm and peaceful as if he were simply taking a serene nap. But he wasn't. It struck me how tranquil he appeared, a stark contrast tothe whirlwind of emotions swirling inside me. I couldn't help but wish for a way to swap places with him, to trade my confusion and restlessness for his stillness. The stark reality of everything tugged at my heart as I sat there.

I grasped his cold hand tightly, feeling the chill seep into my skin, and my own hand trembled as an overwhelming wave of tears began to flow. "Papa, I'm so scared, so very scared," I whispered, my voice barely audible as I fought to keep my composure. With my free hand, I hurriedly wiped away the warm, salty streaks from my cheeks, but more kept flowing. I could feel the weight of fear pressing down on me, making it hard to breathe as I clung to him, hoping for some comfort.

"Rāwiri saw them... my bruises..." I mumbled, a sense of dread creeping over me. "He got so angry and then just stormed off. What if he decides to kick me out? What if he takes me back to Jacob?" I said, my voice shaking and my mouth trembling with fear. The thought of returning to Jacob sent a chill down my spine.

"I keep getting sudden flashbacks, vivid reminders of that day...every day I lived in that house really... The memories invade my mind, replaying scenes that I can't seem to escape. Each one feels as fresh and painful as it did at the moment, haunting me and making it difficult to focus on anything else. It's as if I am trapped in a loop of my past, desperately longing for a way to break free from these relentless thoughts." I mumble.

Jacob lifted his hand swiftly, and as it struck my cheek, a sharp, resounding slap echoed in the quiet room. The sudden impact left a flush of colour on my skin. The sudden jolt from the force caused my head to swivel to the side, disorienting me momentarily. As I tried to regain my bearings, I noticed a sharp, metallic taste coating the tip of my tongue.

I shivered as the memory washed over me like a cold breeze. I reluctantly let go of Papa's hand, feeling his cold hand slip away. I hastily wiped the tears from my cheeks with the sleeves of my worn-out top, trying to gather my thoughts. "If I had grown up here... with you by my side, do you think things would have been different?" I mumbled softly, my voice barely above a whisper, looking up at Papa with hope and longing in my eyes.

Of course, he didn't respond to my question. I understood why he couldn't, but deep down, a part of me held onto the hope that he might surprise me with an answer one day. I longed for him to confirm what I had always imagined - that I could have had a happy childhood with him by my side. Instead, I was left with the stark realization that dreams are just that - illusions we create to escape from reality.

I slowly rise to my feet, the creaking floorboards echoing softly in the quiet room as I walk toward the door. I pause for a moment, glancing back at Papa, wishing he were awake to share a few words with me. My heart aches with the desire to have known him better, to learn about his stories and experiences. But then, an unsettling thought flickers through my mind - the image of him being just like Jacob, filled with anger and disappointment. That realization quickly extinguishes my hopeful thoughts, replacing them with a wave of fear that tightens in my chest, leaving me feeling more alone than before.

I hurriedly exited the room, my heart racing as I navigate down the familiar hallway. As I reach my bedroom door, I take a breath and gently push it open. The hinges creak slightly, breaking the stillness of the air.

To my surprise, I find Rāwiri standing there, captivated by an old photograph he's holding. A snapshot from my childhood when I lived here, nestled in Mama's warm embrace. Her gentle smile radiates love, while Papa gazes down at me with adoration in his eyes, a look that makes my heart ache.

When Rāwiri hears the door open, he looks up, his expression shifting. Time seems to stand still as I freeze in the doorway, overwhelmed by a flood of emotions.