The Secrets Buried With Us | COMPLETE

Flashback 4| Nova

NOVA HAD PARASOMNIA. It was a sleeping disorder that caused her vivid night-terrors that would make her wake up in a pool of sweat, but for her, that wasn't the worst of it.

Nova's Parasomnia caused her to do abnormal things when she was asleep, like walking around or talking. She would often fall asleep in bed and then wake up the next morning in a completely different room.

When things got worse, she could unlock doors and wander outside the house past curfew, and this seemed to worry her parents. Although they never said it out loud, she knew her parents thought there was something wrong with her. They didn't bother to discuss it with a doctor, because they knew that she would be seen as crazy and she would be sent away to some kind of insane asylum.

Despite her best efforts, there was nothing she could do to stop these strange behaviours from happening. Jace had tried to help her by keeping her awake all night or installing locks on her bedroom door, but this only made her sleep-deprived and anxious, and she had soon learned how to unlock the doors in her sleep, so it was no use.

She soon became scared of herself and the astonishing things she was capable of doing while she was asleep. Nova remembered one time when a frightening accident had happened during her sleep, and she had her fingers crossed that nobody had noticed. It had happened on a school night in May, a couple of weeks before Nick's sudden death.

She and Jace had stayed up for hours to study for a test she had the day after, and Jace became a little irritated when Astrid insisted that they go over the flashcards for the hundredth time.

"I'm sure you're more than ready for your test Nova, we've been over these a million times. You know everything on these flashcards like the back of your hand" he reassured her, stifling a heavy yawn, and blinking to keep himself awake. Nova shook her head, remaining persistent as always.

"No way Jace. I've got to go over these one more time. I promise this is the last time," she said. Jace sighed dramatically, throwing his hands up in the air with defeat.

"That's what you said an hour ago," he muttered under his breath, shuffling the cards over again. Nova only rolled her eyes. She wasn't as eager as he was to go to bed, but she knew the time was coming. She had to get a good night's rest if she wanted to perform well on her test because, in Newport, test scores determined what job she would get in the future.

To Jace's relief, they finished their study session just as the curfew warning went off and he quickly took the opportunity to slip out of his sister's room.
Nova brushed her teeth and changed into her pajamas before getting into bed. The bed was comfortable, comparable to heaven, and Nova fell asleep quite easily, but the feeling of anxiety still lingered around her as she tossed and turned a little in bed.

She had her fingers crossed that she wouldn't have another one of her weird episodes, but crossing her fingers wasn't enough to stop her. Everything seemed fine for a couple of hours; she moved around slightly in her bed, but nothing too unusual. It was somewhere around one in the morning when Nova, who was still asleep, crept out of bed and began walking to the kitchen.

She grabbed something from one of the drawers before closing it. In her sleep, she whispered some of the things she'd memorized on the flashcards, her voice not loud enough to wake Jace or her parents. She made her way to the front door, which had been left unlocked by Jace who was often forgetful of things like this.

The summer night air was warm, and Nova's face contorted into a smile as she kept sleepwalking down the street. She was tremendously lucky that a Reaper hadn't caught her. Nova's hand reached out and grabbed something, her fists and fingernails closing tightly around it for a few seconds before she released it. A sudden pain shot through her body, her eyes snapping open.

She had walked right into a tree, the bark scratching and cutting her forehead. Nova gasped in horror when she looked down to see a little dead squirrel lying on the ground. The knife was slick with dark blood which glistened underneath the moonlight. Terrified, she took a couple of steps back in disbelief. She had committed a crime that would have her severely punished.

She was hyperventilating, her emotions choking her until she could no longer breathe and she doubled over, breathless. The world was a big dark blur around her, and she felt so sick she could barely think or see straight. Trying to regain control over herself, she took deep breaths, allowing the fresh air to fill her lungs.

She had to make it home before anyone in the neighborhood saw her, or worse a Reaper. Ignoring the pain that shot through her legs as she ran barefoot on the sharp rocks, she ran home, the wind blowing through her hair and tears almost blinding her. She had let it go too far. It was all her fault, or so she thought. She was a murderer.

Nova made it home in time, closing the front door softly behind her, trying to muffle the low creaking sound it made. She rubbed her sweaty palms off her shirt. Big mistake. The blood was on her hands, on the knife, on her shirt. It was everywhere. She got rid of the knife, washing the blood off of it and holding back ugly sobs as she watched the blood go down the drain.

The knife was then discarded, and she scrubbed her hands over and over again until they felt dry and her skin started to peel. She looked at her face in the mirror, the face of a murderer. The skin around her eyes was red and puffy from crying, her nose stuffy and full of mucus. She splashed cold water against her face, hoping that this would wake her up from her terrible nightmare, but this was the only time where her nightmare became a reality.

Nova threw up several times, repulsed by herself and what she had done. She could already imagine the look of horror on her parents' faces when the Reapers would come to take her away. Astrid stayed awake all of that night, shivering even though it was far from cold. The image of the dead squirrel remained in her mind, and she couldn't risk falling back asleep.

If she was capable of murdering a squirrel in her sleep, was she also capable of murdering those she loved?

*End of flashbacks*