CallMeKevin, Can't Help Falling In Love

I SAID NO!

"c'mon babe it will be fun trust me"  I have heard those words before too many times "I said no, Mikey". My voice trembled as he stepped closer. "You don't know the consequences of that you little bitch". My heart dropped I knew what was next, I ducked knowing he was gonna try and hit me. He missed. "you slut, don't try and resist it makes things worse!". The anger growing in Mikey's voice. He would always ask me to go to his friends house with him, but Everytime I did he would just get drunk and want to have sex with me, even if I didn't want to, I never had a choice. I had to. So he wouldn't hurt me. I'm exhausted. I'm scared. I hate him. I ran as fast as I could out of the bedroom, tears forming in my eyes making it hard to walk. "I hate you Mikey, with everything in me!" I shouldn't have said that. "Huh you little bitch I'll make you change your mind". I knew what that meant it's better than being hit but it certainly wasn't great. "Please just leave me alone". I tried to tell but it was just a squeak from the lump in my throat. I finally gave in and fell to the floor, there's no point in running he always finds me, he always catches me. I hate him with everything in me. He's the only one I have left in my life, but at this point, I would rather be alone on the streets. "I'm sorry". I managed to squeak out. "You better be, I'm too good for you, you ugly shit!". He would always say stuff like that. I knew I was ugly and worthless, but he didnt have to remind me. "Now come here you slut". He gripped my arm, a bit to hard but I'm used to it. Why does he do this? Why me? He's 28 years old for fecks sake. Why? We headed to the bedroom l, he stripped me down and used me, I didn't even feel it even more, he was non-existent to me at these moments. And to be fair his dick was tiny. 

*An hour later*
I planned to leave soon, to pack up while he was at work and leave before he got home. I was afraid he would find me though. My thoughts were interupted by the most disgusting thing, his voice, "hey bitch, come make dinner I'm hungry". Of course he was he always was, fat lazy shit. "Oh and get me a beer". That didn't surprise me either. I wouldn't say he was an alcoholic but I wouldn't say he's not. I'm exhausted, so all he's getting is chilli dogs and Mac and cheese it takes 10 minutes. I cooked and we sat down to eat, I can barely even look at him. Sometimes I wish I could poison his meal or that he was allergic to something and I could make it for him. Just in the back of my head I wish, one day, I'll be gone from him and I won't have to worry about him anymore. I was starving I haven't eaten all day becuase of him. I know I have to watch what I eat around him but I was just so hungry. "Hey you fat shit, you gonna save some for me?" My heart dropped as the first thing that I could peep out was, "this is for you, I was just putting it into my bowl so it was easier for you to get". He gave me a look he knew I was lying but I have to pretend like it doesn't faze me for myself and him. Not becuase I want him to like me but becuase I want him to pretend like it. "Alright then bring it here, I'm hungry. Then put it away will ya I don't feel like it, you are the woman after all.!" God I hated him so much. "Ok baby, I gotta go to the bathroom then I will." I gave him a slight smile he didn't deserve. He was mad at me right now more than usual, becuase I didn't want to go to his friends, which caused him to stay home.
I walked to the bathroom and just stared, stared at myself. I thought about everything, I pulled up my shirt and looked at myself, I am ugly, I am fat, I am worthless, I'm stupid, my love life sucks, the weather sucks although that is Ireland, I don't understand myself, I don't deserve to live, I have no one. I walked over to the toilet and I did what I do everyday after dinner. I took my two fingers and I shoved them down my throat, I repeated it until I vomited, I hated doing this but I needed to do it, to feel like I was even a little bit pretty. I tried. I really did. I went out and cleaned up dinner while he got situated in bed. I didn't wanna go into bed with him but I had to.

We got ready for bed and lied down, of course that's not all we did because he can't live 12 hours without sex and a woman. After all that we went to sleep, well he did I can't sleep anymore becuase of my thoughts and his loud ass snoring. We woke up the next morning and I had decided today I would leave I had no where to go and no one to see but I couldn't be here anymore, I've been saving money the best I can, but it's hard when I don't have a job so I've had to steal some from him every week. It felt wrong but I needed to.
He left for work in the morning while I pretended to be asleep as always, after he was for sure gone I got up immediately. I grabbed my backpack out of the closet, it was decently big because I had saved up for just this to get a double backpack. I started packing everything up, all my clothes, my hygienics, my everything. I grabbed the money I had hidden between the wall and the dresser and shoved it in my wallet and then shoved my wallet into my backpack. I didn't even bother writing a note but I did ruin the whole bedroom, I tore apart the bed, knocked over the dresser, and threw all his clothes, I made an absolute mess.

Finally... I'm leaving... I can finally be happy. To Leave to where? No one knows, to see who? No one, but atleast I'm away from this house, and from him. Finally... I'm leaving... I can finally be happy.

(*1135 words, hope you all enjoyed the first chapter! The next chapter we will get into kevi stuff I promise!
:)*)