"We don't have a Caretaker. We have a Creationeer. And we love her."~Humanity.
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In a meadow on the surface of a verdant moon beneath a beautiful clear night, stand two Ethereals who are close friends...
Kit: "What do I do with them? I can't bring them with me on vacation. That defeats the point of a vacation."
Pan: "Leave them here and put a stronger bubble around it. They'll be fine."
Kit: "And what are they gonna do? Just sit there picking their belly buttons? They already do that! And their nose. And everything else. What are they gonna play with?"
Pan: "I don't know. Give them sticks and a sandbox. That always works for Sid's kids."
Kit: -_- "Sid only has to care for a hundred thousand Orkneds on a desert moon, and they're behaving themselves. They just build sand castles, run around, and make stupid faces. I got stuck with twelve humans when Jim fucked off to the Andromeda galaxy to do the same with his ex AND DIDN'T COME BACK. It's been eighteen thousand years! I mean, of course he's never getting these humans back after what he did to them, but still. I'm a Creationeer, not a Caretaker! I did not sign up to become an 'unexpected parent' trope!"
Pan: "And yet here you are."
Kit: "I can't get anything done when every time I turn around -- Hey! Hey, you get that out of your mouth right now! You don't know where that's been! ... Don't look at me like that! Don't... don't... I know what you're doing, and it's not gonna work.... Stop... stop it... Don't give me the Tooku pup eyes. .............That's not fair." *sigh* "Five year olds. I hate it when they do that. Ok, ok, fine, you can play with it. But keep it out of your mouth. ... And don't hit anyone with it! ...And don't shove it up your nose, either! I remember last time! Do you want to have Pan remove it? Again? Didn't think so." *sighs* " See what I have to deal with?"
Pan: "They are cute, though. Look at that one pack bonding with a rock. Awe, they put a face on it! That's adorable. Your kids are the only ones that do that, you know."
Kit: -_- .......................... "Yeah. Not helping."
Pan: "Ok. Solutions. How about this; give them some blocks to stack, maybe a few magnets, some coloring books, and move a small moon into orbit. If they somehow manage to break the bubble and reach it, you'll know and can check in on them."
Kit: ............................
Pan: "Ok, you're giving me that skeptical face. How about this; put another one a few million miles outside the bubble - say..., on the little red planet next door. It's still inside the yard. And if they somehow reach that, it'll set off the alarm."
Kit: "I don't know. Blocks? They're pretty inventive. I saw one stick a mushroom on a stick once, cover it with namai juice, and it glowed in the dark. They had a nightlight for days. Within the year, their entire family lit their personal space with them and learned to grow and harvest both to have a sustainable light source! They figured out that particular mushroom reacted to the namai juice to make it glow. You know why? Because that human's afraid of the dark. - Actually they're all afraid of the dark - but they figured it out! I didn't tell them that."
Pan: "O...M...G..... That's the cutest thing I've ever heard! Make sure this play-pen-moon has bioluminescent life and mushrooms. I want to see what they do."
Kit: "I don't know about leaving them alone for too long."
Pan: "They'll be fine. They're tough kids. I already said I'd watch them."
YOU ARE READING
Our Reluctant Caretaker
Science Fiction"We don't have a Caretaker. We have a Creationeer. And we love her." ~Humanity. We think we're from here, but are we really? What happened to us before then, and who was involved? Kit - a young B-Tier Creationeer - didn't want this job. She's not t...