reticence. [Eren Jaeger x reader]

5] Pale Shelter

HQ was a mess, and that was no understatement. Soldiers were dashing back and forth, the entire room buzzing with nerves, as each soldier prepared to inevitably face their first Titan. You were among those people, hands shaking as you filled up your tank with gas.

"Quit shaking," Amaya stated, from next to you. "That's not going to help."

"How am I not supposed to?" a mirthless laugh escaped your lips, "I think I'm going to die here."

"No you're not," your sister clasped a hand over your shoulder, eyes boring into yours. "I'm going to protect you. And you're going to protect me. Ok?"

All you could do was nod feebly in response, before she took your hand, and walked you over to the courtyard, where the rest of the soldiers were, awaiting instructions from the commanding officer. You'd forgotten his name, but even he was dripping with sweat, the crazed look he possessed giving you further anxiety.

"As practiced," he spoke, "you will now split into your squad and perform resupply, message relay and Titan clearing duties under the command of the Garrison regiment!

"The Garrison Regiment's intercept squad with take the vanguard! The cadets, lead by the support squad, will take the middle guard, and the Garrison Regiment's elite squad will take the rearguard! Additionally, I've recieved word that the advance team has been wiped out!"

It took all of your might not to burst into tears as that information caused your stomach to contrort uncomfortably. Amaya instantly gripped your hand tighter, noticing your intense fear.

You'd dreamed of this day happening. You'd seen it within your mind, imagined it with perfect clarity.

So why was it so hard to comprehend now it was a reality?

"The outer gate has been breached, and titans have been allowed inside! In other words, the Armoured Titan could very well appear again and demolish the inner gate at any time!"

"Control yourself," Amaya hissed, as you intook a sharp breath, squeezing your eyes shut.

"Quiet!" the captain yelled, silencing the crowd of soldiers, who'd broke out into panicked whispers at the mention of the Titan that had crushed the wall so many years ago. "The vanguard is currently engaged with the enemy! This defense has but one objective: defend Wall Rose until it's citizens have finished evacuating! Desertion is punishable by death! Be prepared to lay down your lives! Dismissed!"

Once everyone had finished saluting, you turned slightly, to meet eyes with Amaya, who was already facing you. Involuntarily, your gaze wobbled, as tears of terror started to pour down your face.

"I don't want to die," you whimpered, almost pleading with her.

"You're not going to," Amaya assured you, wiping away the salty water from your face.

"I-I can't do it, Amaya," you spluttered, "I don't want to—"

"Goddamnit (Y/n)," Amaya cursed, before abruptly wrapping her arms around you.

You couldn't help but gasp; Amaya never hugged you! Not even as a child, she was never one for physical contact—she'd push off her parents, and give you a warning look whenever you reached for her.

"Do you trust me?" she asked, stroking your hair.

"Y-Yeah," you responded blankly, hands hanging limply at your sides.

"Then trust me enough not to get killed. I trust you not to get killed. So pull yourself together, and do the best you can," Amaya rocked you gently.