Despair In The Apartment Lounge

56| be cruel to me, cause I don't want to lose you

Honestly, i got kinda sad writing the heavy dialogued scenes near the end. Hope yall
suffer as well❤️

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Song title from:
Suck it and see

What does it mean to be inhumane? Who decides whether an action is interpreted as inhumane or unkind?

What act could possibly be seen as so disaccordinlygly to the imaginative standard society has set for us- to the point of being labeled something completely void of our kinds natural propensity.

Inhumane. Cold. Cruel. Callous. Heartless.

Another element exists beyond the right and wrong, or the black and white- where its a simple mixture of both; it's unclear and it's grey. Where the white gets tainted by the black, where the rights and the wrongs get difficult to set apart as they equally coexist.

But what if you're unsure what color you are? If white represented the right, and black the wrong. And you did something perceived as horrible and unkind by others, but you yourself view it purely as a consequential innocuous act driven out by another persons actions. How could you be the white if you had hurt someone?

Cause and effect. Your action is the chosen effect, which will soon become a cause for another persons chosen effect.

So, what is the truth?
Who gets to determine what color you are?
Yourself, or the others effected by it?

Alex arrived home later than norm. He'd just been at the gym for a few hours, and the need to shower away the stench of sweat was eating at him. No music or other sounds entered his ears, no smell of either burnt of savory food entered his nostrils, no sight of activity whatsoever; which was harshly opposing to the usual welcoming he would be granted every time he walked through those steel doors.

When he entered the main bedroom, he found her in the same position he had left her in.

Asleep on her side, with the ends of her braids meeting the pillow from behind. One hand tucked underneath between the cushion and her cheek, and another hand tucked away between her thighs that were slightly brought up. It was late afternoon when he had left, and now peering out the window of the room, the sky was saturated in such a dark blue undertone with the moon hidden somewhere.

I love you.

Alex thought, aware of being so soppily sentimental. He couldn't help it at times. His eyes dart to the space beside the sleeping beauty.

Kid slept soundly with his tiny arms above his head, and as Alex moves closer to inspect him; he finds the puffy red cheeks to be damp with a few tear stains on his onesie. Bolsters and pillows were placed strategically next to him and on the ground, as to not let the little thing fall over and if he were -then there'd at least be cushioning. Then again, Alex was pretty sure Kid wasn't even able to roll over yet.

The two looked so tranquil next to each other.

The definition of 'home' was a bit loose for Alex these days, when he brought up the word it was almost always referring to Talaska's place rather than his and Louise's. Sometimes even Miles and Sarah's house some blocks away.

Alex and Talaska had developed a simple routine over time. Most days, they spent together with Kid. Other days when weren't, they'd go on with their own professional work and check up on the other before bed. The routine was inconsistent, varying slightly on any given day or circumstance. But the two major things they had agreed to keep fixed and completely inflexible for their joint schedule were; their early morning strolls, as well as the Tuesday and Friday afternoons spent boxing.