Cover Your Tracks [HS][2014 VERSION]

48. Hold On Till May

"And as the sun went down, we ended up on the ground. I heard the train shake the windows, you screamed over the sound . . ."

Flying through the air came with all of the sensations of riding a rollercoaster. It had a drop that took my stomach with it while my hair whipped wildly in all directions. The air had been expelled from my lungs as I screamed and closed my eyes, regretting ever putting myself through this free fall. Every part of it seems familiar, somehow, only there is nothing there to catch me before I collide harshly with the ground.

The sharp, jagged edges of rocks tear away at my skin as I roll uncontrollably down the incline supporting the tracks. My eyes are closed but I can still hear the train as it whizzes past, brakes squealing and horn blaring over my grunts and whimpers with each and every blow to the ribs as I tumble. The conductor had been just a little too late to make the call, for I had stood in front of his mighty train with the intentions of being hit.

My mind is hazy. My body lulls to a stop, and even though every inch of skin stings, a lulling numbness soon spreads over my entire body. An effect of the adrenaline that had left moments prior. The numbness soon grows heavy, settling somewhere deep within my chest, weighing me down. My vision is distorted and blurred, lights dancing in my vision from the powerful impact.

The touch of another ghosts along my skin. It beckons me to open my eyes and I do so, coming face to face with a darkened figure. They hover above me, holding my face in their hands as if I am not strong enough to hold myself together alone. The outline of their features is illuminated by the moon, their silhouette outlined against the dark sky.

I hesitantly reach out in fear that touching the being would cause it to vanish. Already their arms shake as they cage me in, holding me like a ragdoll in their strong arms.

"Are you some kind of angel sent to rescue me?"

Those words are of my last utterance before my eyelids close over. The train sounds distant now, and my mind seems to go with it; a thousand miles away from this moment.

My arms and legs dangle in the air as my body is lifted. Hot air steadily hits my forehead and I picture my angel flying high above the trees, taking me with it. I seem to float through another dimension throughout the ride. My angel picks up speed, moving quickly, zigzagging through the clouds.

I hear the gate to heaven open. I see the light penetrate my closed eyelids. I feel the warmth envelope me as my angel shelters me within his large, feathery wings.

And all at once, I am at complete and utter peace.

For hours I float around like this, my mind and body disconnected from one another. My bones feel heavy and yet, I can't bring myself to move them. Sounds are heard all around me yet I can't bring myself to listen or respond, for that matter. Everything seems so close yet far away at the same time.

The same sound replays over and over like a broken record. I shake my head, willing the noise to gradually lessen until it becomes nothing at all. I manage to move it side to side two, three, maybe even four times before it is held still between two opposing forces, forcing me to listen.

Forcing me to feel.

One by one, my senses return to me. First, I feel the warmth of genuine touch along the skin of my cheek and along my jawline. Next, I hear the voice that calls out to me so desperately.

It all gives me the strength to open my eyes for what feels like the first time in a long time. He is the first thing I see, leaning over the bed whilst holding my face in his large hands. A combination of expressions take over his own, beginning with joy and shock only to transform into anger and frustration.