Breathe

The First Chat: Part 12

The commander laughed at her obvious hopelessness, telling the two captives that they were going out for lunch and they would be back in a couple of hours. Logan was dragged to the other side of the room where the guards posted outside would be able to hear if he tried to move over to Safiya. The door closed and Logan turned to her, whispering "I am so fucking sorry, baby. I tried so hard to keep them from you, I did everything I could. I am so fucking sorry."

She sniffed. "It's okay. I know you did. I'm sorry I got you stabbed." She tried to laugh.

He forced a little laugh, trying to make light of the situation. "Are you okay? That's a stupid question. I know you're not."

"Since you're not allowed to talk, I want to steal a blinking system from one of my books." He nodded earnestly and she continued, "One blink for yes. Two for no, three: are you okay? Four: I am here, I am with you. Five for I love you."

"Sounds good. What about 'I'm sorry'?" he asked.

"If we have 'I'm sorry' we'll spend the whole time saying that, and that isn't very good for us."

"That's true," he admitted. He repeated the system back to her and she nodded. "Hey," he whispered. She looked up at him with sorrow-filled eyes. "We're going to get out of here."

She scoffed. "No," he insisted, "we are. No man left behind. They would have noticed that six of us have gone missing and they're searching for us right now."

"Yeah, unless they think you're all dead," she grimaced.

"Even then," he soothed, "they'll come for the bodies. Somebody will come. And in the meantime..." he blinked four times and winked at her. She gave a small smile and blinked five times. "I love you too," he breathed before the heavy door clicked open once more.

The guards had barely been gone for 10 minutes, but one came back in, placed a gag in Logan's mouth, ignored his glare and walked back out again. Logan tried unsuccessfully to spit it back out. Safiya smiled sadly at him and started talking. She spoke to him about what she had done since he had deployed, about her studies, her shooting and her family. She talked to him about her pets, her friends, and her travels. She told him about how much she missed him, and how she thought about him all the time, struggling to get him off her mind enough to complete her daily tasks. Throughout her talking, he did the only thing he could to communicate. Every time he blinked 5 times, she would let out a little smile. He understood why she was talking, she needed to know he was there, that he was real, she needed to be able to remember that she had a somewhat normal life out there. She needed to remind herself that once she got out of here, there were things on the outside that were waiting to greet her. Safiya knew that Logan needed her constant talking too. He needed to be reminded that she really was there, that she was okay, and hearing the little details about her life that nobody else would know proved to him that she wasn't just another hallucination. He needed to know that she still had hope, and hearing her voice, no matter what she was saying had 2 effects. 1: He knew that she wasn't too overwhelmed by pain to hinder her talking, and 2: hearing her voice soothed him. He would have liked for her to not be here at all, but hearing her talk about her everyday life for the first time in 4 months was amazing. He had missed her so fucking much. Her letters were the highlights of his trip. He looked forward to them every week, but it wasn't the same as talking to her, even over the phone, being able to hear her voice was amazing. She noted the sad look in his eyes, but also the love behind the sadness. The pain and fear.

"Did you miss me too?" she forced a whisper of a laugh. He nodded furiously, blinking once. "How much?" She asked slyly? "Enough to buy me something pretty when we get out of here?"

He nodded again, blinking once more.

"How about one of those pieces of eternity jewellery I wanted?"

One blink.

"You know those are for like collaring, aye? You would hold the key or combination and I couldn't take it off?" She said slowly.

He nodded slowly. She blinked the wetness out of her eyes.

Logan blinked 5 times.

"To the moon and back?" She whispered.

He nodded, blinking 5 times again.

She smiled at him, "I love you too."

He cocked his head, murmuring something she knew meant 'to the moon and back?'

She kept smiling and blinked once as the door opened again.