Moving On [H.S]

Chapter 12

Friday. Harry can barely focus on his work because tomorrow is the day he goes to see his mom again. Maya has noticed his dazed nature, as if he is drifting in and out of thought at random times. So she pulls him out of his cubicle and up to the roof during lunch.

"Since your head is so stuck in the clouds, I thought it was fitting to come up here."

She jokes and he chuckles.

"What's been on your mind?"

She asks as they sit down in their usual spot.

"I'm visiting my mom tomorrow."

He says and she nods.

"Nervous?"

"Very."

"That's understandable."

She says and he sighs.

"I hate feeling nervous. She's my mom, I shouldn't be scared to see her."

He says and Maya nods in understanding. She has always been terrified of her own mother.

"My brain is trying to overthink and talk myself out of it."

"Don't let yourself do that. You'll spend the rest of your life regretting it."

She says and Harry nods.

"Regret is harder to live with than the sadness of rejection."

She says quietly and he nods, picking up on how she only speaks about things she knows about. Her deep and wise words convey the fact that she has been through so much.

"You're right."

"I know I am."

She says laughing a little.

"If I wasn't right, I'd be happy."

She mutters and hiccups a little.

"Are you drunk?"

He asks and she slips out a secret flask from the pocket of her dress jacket.

"You're a sneak you are."

He says slightly amused, but also concerned.

"The world is too boring when you're sober."

She says and he furrows his brows.

"You pay attention too much, you over think...and then it's all ruined."

She says and Harry shrugs.

"But then you're too inebriated to see the small things that make it all worthwhile."

He says and she furrows her brows, thinking about his words. They repeat over and over again in her head.

"It's painful to be sober. You just want to drown it all away, flush out the pain with whatever you can get your hands on..."

He says, starting to speak from experience.

"But then when you flush out the bad, you're getting rid of the good too. Instead of feeling happy, you're just numb, void of any feeling or purpose. It's harder to stay sober and go through the pain, but you at least keep your happiness."

He says and she pauses, glancing over at him, and he sees slight tears in her eyes.

"Sorry if that was a lot-"

"No you're fine...I guess...I guess that was just something I needed to hear."

She says and he nods. They spend the rest of their lunch break passing jokes, trying to lighten the mood from the serious words they exchanged earlier. Maya takes the train home, not wanting to be around Isabella while she is tipsy, which Harry appreciates.