The Truth About Sex & Surfing [Featured Story]

Chapter nineteen

There was a long, gaping pause. Then he said: “I’m sorry, Hailey. I can’t see it happening any time soon.”

Damn, she thought. I so shouldn’t have said anything.

Ugh. Now this was getting embarrassing. Why, why, why had she gone out on a limb like that instead of keeping her mouth shut? She’d gotten so wrapped up in his story that she’d just blurted it out, but now she could see that it was totally crazy to have invited him to come visit, to stay with her. She should never even have picked up the phone when he’d called that second time.

“So it’ll just be me and Laura to watch Kylie for a few weeks. I can’t get away. Besides…”

“Hey, listen. It’s not a big deal,” Hailey squeaked, hating herself. “No worries, right?”

Dylan laughed – not quite as though anything was funny. More rueful or resigned. “You know, I used to travel any time I wanted – got on a plane at the drop of a hat. It’s just not possible now.”

“It was a dumb idea. I just thought. Um.” She didn’t finish her sentence. She couldn’t, because she was too disappointed. Closing her eyes, she leaned her forehead against the wall, only just able to resist the impulse to bang it.

Dylan was saying maybe he could come visit someday, maybe as soon as in a few months’ time. He’d really like to, anyway. He’d try to work something out.

Hailey could hear some reluctance in his voice, she just couldn’t tell what exactly it was for – he might be sorry he couldn’t come or he might be simply wanting to get off the phone with her so he could end the awkwardness. “Seriously, no pressure. Just, uh, send me a postcard sometime. Or wave. You know, like from a tall building. Or something. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Don’t be like that.”

“I’m not being like anything. “ She opened her eyes to stare at the wall, inches from her face. “Actually, what I’m being is realistic. Of course you can’t get away. You’ve got a daughter and a life. A business to run. And I’ve got, uh, a few things going on here.”

“Like what?”

She tried to remember. “My sister, the deli…”

“Your boss?”

It was clear enough what he meant. She blinked, surprised. “God, no. It’s complicated, but not that complicated.”

“You’re not really giving me a lot to go on here.”

If only he knew what she was really talking was refilling Diet Cokes, and ordering cheesecakes and industrial-size boxes of napkins. Nothing glamorous or romantic. Which could be a good thing. She wondered if, maybe, running the restaurant would help her forget all about Dylan. Who needed love and sex when there was so much work to be done? She only wished she could fast-forward past this awful, sick feeling. For a second, Hailey wavered, and thought of saying it out loud: I WANT TO SEE YOU. I WANT TO BE WITH YOU. Instead, she mumbled: “I’m glad you told me your life story. Now we’re even.”

“Well, I guess so, but that’s not—”

“But anyway you’re there and I’m here, and in between there’s ten thousand miles. It’s not like anything I could say that could change that.”

“Are you dumping me then?”

“I didn’t think we were together.”

“Not properly, I know, but…”

“Right. So.” It was all she could get out.

Dylan didn’t say anything for a moment. When he spoke again, his voice had changed. Gone colder and more formal, though Hailey had to admit the Australian accent never got very formal at all. “I guess I just don’t really know why I went to the trouble to explain myself, and reach out and tell you this stuff.”