At the end of the tunnel

The Ticket

That's how I started working here I guess it was my ticket to be given the chance.
'Be a good girl, a morally upright girl 'that was mama's words which used to guide me along the way. The flashbacks bring about memories, memories that each time I recall my eyes become watery.I wish to burry this pain deep down the ground so that no day will they ever rise up in my mind. But now the cruel city ate up your girl mother, someday I will be fine.

I had  to do this for your sake and  my little ones ' sacrificial lamb'. But which day is this maybe I will be fine in the grave perhaps earth am just but a passersby. I have suffered, and am suffering and I guess I will keep suffering as long as am alive. But where is the hope I had, all became shattered, my big dreams became fantasy, just building castles in the air.

Whenever I keep recalling this tears roll down my chubby cheeks. But as they said the truth is bitter, accepting it is hard and like a knife it cuts with its edges.

I lost my virginity to this man my boss. Nowadays we smile at each other but whenever am alone I keep regretting. But regrets come after and if wishes were horse, I could be the first beggar to ride and run away from this planet called earth.

Sorrow pain circulates my poor mind but that is life you have to be strong.

The evening is cool, massive of customers have arrived. Am in a booty short with a crop top. It's not cold inside here it's warm due to the large crowds. We dress like this to entice customers and make them come again and again.

Have you ever bought something and it sooths your eyes, so that's how we behave. They say looks are deceptive but never mind this is where my daily incomes come from.

Am carrying a tray which has some glasses and a bottle of some Vodka. "Excuse me sir, here is your order," I said to three gentlemen who had ordered me.

They kept smiling at me and not breaking the rules of this restaurant we, the workers especially the ladies we act like nectar. For the insects to come to the flower nectar must be produced to attract them.
We attract them through our services, how we dress and even sometimes you can earn more than the given salary by extending to having affairs with them.

Atleast I got some knowledge, I passed through the system, am proud of myself.

I recall Mr Njoroge when he used to teach us reproduction in plants when I was in class six. Those days when I was the best always on top with excellent marks. But where am I now, it's not my fault neither mother's fault, I blame the government for imposing large fees on the students.

They think everyone is the same, or perhaps I have learnt what it was meant when they used to say education is an equalizer, we are not same, we don't come from the same background, yours is great you can raise some but mine is low, we just can't make or even raise a penny. I hate this life, I kept the bitter thoughts flooding my mind.