Dark(dragon) Humor

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Just noticed I haven't updated this in a while so I'd thought to make a short story with a little bit of dark humor,

DD728

P.S. I'm lame at horror.

P.S.S. I'm also lame at humor.

SURVIVING THE NIGHT ▶

"So did you survive the one night?"

I gave the person a look that said, 'your so stupid'.

"What?! Why are you looking at me like that?!"

I shook my head, frustrated already.

I was locked in 'The Room', the supposedly most scariest stay-the-night haunted house. To be honest I was only there to prove the 'haunted' part was completely bogus, that, and a friend dared me and it's hard for me not to accept a challenge. Lying down on my temporary bed, I stared up at the ceiling in boredom, drumming my fingers against the blankets, and noticed the fan was slowly turning. I gave an odd look. Did I turn it on? I passed the action of the fan as just some type of scientific air current in the room. I then began to stare more deeper at the fan and saw it starting to distort. I passed off the sight as the shadows playing with my head. I shook my head in denial, the thought of being in a haunted house is manipulating my mind. Thumping ensued outside the door, as if someone was stomping and my heart started pounding like I ran a marathon.

"Hello? Y'all aren't gonna scare me if you keep this racket up!", I shouted through the door in warning. To investigate and reveal the annoying person creating the noise, I got up from my position and laid on the ground to peer through the small crack under the door. My eyes widened in fear when I discovered... Nothing... There's nothing there! Quickly getting up, I jumped up on the bed as if something was going to nip at my feet from under it. 'The monster under the bed is', I thought stupidly and laughed. Then I--

"This doesn't answer my question! Did. You. Survive?"

"Shut up and just listen!"

"Whatever."

Then I put my hand over my heart as if to calm it, slowly falling asleep when something whispered inaudibly against my ear. I jumped in fright and tried to breathe, but I was only able to gasp and start hyperventilating. Moving my hands to cover my i eyes, I let out a sob. This was a stupid idea. I am stupid for agreeing with this stupid idea. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Pressing my palm against my eyes i wiped the few tears that manage to escape. Exhausted, I snuggled my head deeper in the lone pillow I was given and repeated to look up with lazy, slightly crazed, eyes. Continuing to--

"Why do you keep talking about your self?"

I gave a glare and ignored the person.

Pausing from staring up in a daze, I shifted my gaze down instictually to my body. My breathing froze permanently as I beheld the sight in front of me--

"Soooo...?"

"So what?"

The person smacked his nonexistent face, even though he knew it would go straight through.

"Did you survive?"

"I just said, and I quote,'My breathing froze permanently', end quote."

"I don't get it, what does that have to do with anything?"

I made an over-exaggerated sigh that produced a big cloud as if it was in the negative of degrees.

"No."

"Cool, I didn't either."


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