Talking to the Moon // dreamnotfound

somewhere far away

He didn't seem to like me very much. I couldn't really tell though, he didn't really speak to me.

I didn't mind though because I didn't really speak to him or see him that much. We were just two people at university who didn't know each other.

George was perfect though. He had great grades, never took shit from anyone and his smile would bring light to any room. I only ever saw him across the room from me, always laughing about something with his friends or flipping off some prick who'd approached him. Both were insanely attractive to me and I found myself sneaking glances during lectures.

"What is your deal, man?" Nick nudged me out of my thoughts. I quickly took my eyes away and shot them down. "You keep looking over there. You wanna be part of their group or something?" he joked.

"No, no. I'm sure you'll do for a friend," I returned and he scoffed, just as the professor walked in.

"Damn straight I will. Anyway, are you coming to the club later? I heard the performing arts girls are all going to be there," Nick asked, excitedly rubbing his hands together. Nick didn't know I was gay and would most likely end up in some guy's bed tonight.

"Yep, sounds fun to me," I said, though when I glanced back to George, he was turning around to face where the professor was about to start his lecture. He must've noticed me staring because he caught my eye and gave me a small smile, though he didn't look at me again for the rest of the lecture.

-

I was sitting on my bed, staring at my phone and clutching George's ring in my palm. I was putting off calling my mother because then it would make it too real, though I needed her to come and look after the kids because I couldn't face them. I couldn't face my empty bed.

Eventually, I caved and punched in my passcode since my thumb was too wet to be recognised.

It opened right onto George's contact and I stared at the last message he'd sent me. Love you, idiot

I looked up and saw the photo of us as his profile picture, him grinning so widely that his eyes were crescent moons as I kissed his cheek. I remember that night.

Before I had even clicked on my mother's name, droplets of tears dotted my phone and distorted my vision once again.

However, I powered through, finding her contact and pressing the call button.

"Hi, Clay, how are you doing?" she chirped from the other end. I wanted to hang up.

I still had tears in my eyes when I spoke but it came out strangled and broken. "I- I need you to come over," I sobbed. I didn't know how I was going to manage the next bit.

"Oh, baby. What's wrong?" she sounded so concerned.

"I- George," just saying his name hurt. "George is- he was in an accident and he... he's gone. He passed," I choked out, rubbing my eyes ferociously with my shirt sleeve.

"Oh, goodness. My god, I'm so sorry. I'll be round as soon as I can," she said shakily. "Love you, Clay I'll see you in a bit, just hold on, ok?"

I nodded though she couldn't see. "Yeah. The children- they don't know yet. I'm going to tell them tomorrow, but don't say anything yet, ok?"

She paused for a moment. "Alright, see you later."

"Ok," I said and hung up.

I fell back on my bed, holding his ring to my heart and biting my lip as I let more tears go.

I'd turned off the oven and just given them cereal for dinner before I put them to bed. I couldn't manage anything else and I think they knew that so they didn't complain. Although, I'm pretty sure they liked cereal in the evening.