Michael Jackson is a grocery worker and he has a speech problem. Over the years, since he was a kid, all he every got was bullying and abuse from his father and many people through school. He grew up being too shy to talk and he writes through paper...
To my journal, today is just like what any other day was. Today was my day off and i didn't get too drunk like normally. First thing I could think about was how my brothers got killed. Something that's been sticking with me since I was smaller. About six or seven to be exact. I had an appointment with my therapist but I never really try to speak unless I have to but that's hard too.
I'm even scared that if I ever meet someone, they won't really like me or treat me like shit because I can't talk. I will also head to the library later on across town, to get me a few books to read. I love reading and I had to turn a few in.
Then I guess I'll head out to the cafe later on just to relax and listen to some good jazz.. tonight was jazz night.
Signed the stutter..
I closed my journal and sat on the couch for a little while. Rubbing under my eyes a little bit, I took a deep breath. The quietness that surrounded me was bothersome today. I wanted something interesting in my life besides my good job, my home and my dog. Music was something that lightened my darker days and singing made me smile. Knowing that was the only ability that I had besides drawing and being a adventurous person, I felt like my life was sad.
I finally got up and turned on my record player. I always loved the oldies but goodies. So I played some Earth, Wind and Fire to ease the quietness. After I turned it up, I walked down the hall to my room and took me out something to put on. I felt comfortable to wear my orange long sleeved shirt and my favorite black pants. Feeling good now, I went inside my bathroom and changed our of the clothes I wore yesterday. Another thing I was scared of, was the fact that I was developing a skin condition called virtilgo.
It has brought me down to my lowest too. But I just try my best in keeping my spirits up and moving forward. Sometimes, I keep up with a little light makeup to hold my face. Insecurities, I know but this was my everyday routine. I turned on the shower and hopped in.
After my half hour shower, I got out and did my hair. I applied my small makeup and I dried off to get dressed. I put on my clothes and grabbed my black fedora. I walked back down the hall and fixed me a bagel with some cream cheese. I grabbed an orange juice and grabbed my dog Chester's leash.
I wanted to take him out to ride with me today as well. I drove to the park to let him get some air, we got out the car and I went to my trunk to get him a toy or two. I let him go and run around in the park. He was happy and he made me happy.
I just wanted to be like him sometimes or the people in the common fairytale books. A prince finding his princess or Snow White.. maybe Cinderella but the reality.. I don't have a fairy godmother to put a 12 am spell curfew just so I can talk like a regular person.
I sat down in the grass under a tree that hovered over me and kept throwing the ball to Chester.
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