Road to Arcadia: the Path East

Chapter Forty-one: Morning Arrives Again

Kai took advantage of his sleepless night, using the extra time to gather his things before the sun rose. His lasting gift to the state would be a subtle spike in the water bill as he took one final shower at his leisure in his old bathroom, taking extra care to turn up the heat until the old mirror steamed past reflection.

He dressed in his R&R uniform before exiting his bedroom. He was on the job, after all. The white suit was only pulled up to his waist, black undershirt covering his upper half and white sleeves tied in front of his navel.

He dropped his belongings by the front door, bag a few pounds heavier with nostalgic souvenirs. The house was still dark. Only the faintest greyed blues of dawn cut through the pitch blackness. As he laced up his boots, he could hear the delicate knock of wood from the top of the stairs.

Kai looked up to see Sara carefully closing her bedroom door behind her. Her hair was frizzed, her baggy sweatpants hung off of her. She tiptoed down the hallway, descending only a handful of steps before stopping to meet his gaze.

Kai stood up straight.

"Hey," she said, voice above a whisper, but soft enough not to disturb the waking morning.

"Hey."

"Mom left for work already."

The news wasn't a surprise, but it still ripped into his chest hard enough he almost checked for blood. "I figured she was going to do that."

There was a long, knowing silence between them.

"So?" Kai asked.

"So what?" she countered.

"Are you coming?"

Sara let out a shaky sigh. "Kai--"

"This is the last time I can ask, Sara. This is your last chance."

"This is your last chance."

He tried to control whatever was welling up inside of him. "I just want your son to have the best life that he can."

Her big brown eyes were prominent, even in the limited light of an unbroken dawn. "I just want my son to have you."

Her words were tentpoles, piercing his chest under the guise of creating shelter. "We can have both of those things, you know. Both can exist if you come with me."

She shook her head. "Arcadia is your story, Kai. And it's the best story I've ever heard, but...but it wasn't meant for us. That's just the way it's supposed to be, you know?"

Kai wanted to argue. He wanted to tell her how nothing was ever 'meant to be', that the universe was not some benevolent or malevolent force putting things into the right places. The universe was a chaotically neutral entity, capable of inflicting the worst harm on the best people as much as righteous judgment on the worst, creating only the illusion of cosmic justice. If there was only one thing left in this world, it was free will. The only way you were ever going to get anything was by running after it yourself.

But Kai couldn't say that. He couldn't say anything. He could only expend his energy trying to quell the sea of anger and grief and hopelessness that was churning inside him.

He finally took a deep breath. "Is there anything I could say to convince you to come with me?"

She shook her head. "Just like I know there's nothing I can do to stop you from leaving."

"If I leave, Sara, I don't know when you'll hear from me again. Arcadia is a secret for a reason. If something happens--if something bad happens to you or mom or baby Edan, you won't have any way to get a hold of me. If the water comes again, I can't guarantee we'll be able to save you. You understand that, right?"