🖤EMERGE🖤

Chapter 9

Cool air caresses my aching face. I can hear a low, faint beep nearby. My eyes feel heavy, like I have been sleeping for ages. Lights blind me as I wake up. "Where... where am I?"

"Hospital." He just stared at me with glassy eyes. "You scared the hell out of me, Alex. I thought I lost you. I thought that I lost you to that idiot." Dad closes his eyes.

I looked over at him. "I lost myself... I don't even remember it. I-I just remember everything going dark and then laying on the floor with you suited up, everything's blurry."

Dad got up and hugged me. "I'm so sorry I let you down. I should have looked for you harder when you left."

"I should be the one apologizing, dad. I don't even know what happened. Loki came to me and asked me to fight with him and I just... I just left school with him. Then he started his mind control thing... I wouldn't have joined him if I was thinking straight... I don't know what's wrong with me."

Dad crosses his arms and leans back in his chair. "He's gotten under your skin." I shook my head repeatedly. "Yes... yes he did. I saw this all before with you."

I bit my cheek for a second. "I can't, I can't, I can't."

"You can't help who you have feelings for, but I don't know why it's him of all people." He sighs. "I don't like it because of him you are in this hospital bed. Because of him, I had to put my daughter here."

* * *

Walking into the tower with dad following. I'm tired, and honestly annoyed, maybe even angry.. I don't even know anymore. "Kid, what's your issue? We kicked ass, why aren't you more excited?" I ignored him and started into the elevator. "Did I do something?" I sighed and crossed my arms over my chest. "Alexandria, look at me."

Dad turns me to look at him. "Nothing's wrong."

I turned back around facing the doors. "Are you having trouble sleeping?" The elevator doors open and I walk off. "Alex, I'm talking to you." he says sternly.

"Just back off!" I spit out.

Dad stomps behind me. "Hey! Get back here now, you sure as hell do not walk away from me while I'm talking to you!" I stopped and turned around looking at him as he points to the table. "Sit. Now."

"I don't have time for this." I turn to walk to my room, but dad grabs my arm. "What the hell, dad."

I glared at him as he gives me a look of frustration. "We're going to talk. Now, sit down at the damn table." I do as asked as he does the same. "What's going on with you? You've been acting off for weeks. I'm worried and so is Pepper." I fiddle with my hands as he continues. "Is it because of him? Or did I do something? Nightmares back?"

"Oh my god, I'm not a basket case, dad. Stop questioning me like one!"

Dad took a breath. "This isn't like you, Alex."

"People are constantly changing so maybe this is my change." I said with a sigh.

Dad crosses his arms. "You're depressed and my hypothesis is that it's him. He's gone and now you're like this."

"Your hypothesis, seriously? I am not one of your many projects."

Dad looked confused. "I never said that you were, but that's my guess as to what's been going on with you. I've been going to therapy since everything that's happened. I needed some way to let everything out. I've been dealing with panic attacks and anxiety attacks where I could barley walk out the door for the first three weeks since Loki. You have all those dreams and nightmares maybe this will help get a better understanding with them. You can go to the therapist office I go to."

"Therapy really? Let's add to the troubled rich girl stereotypes, why don't we?" I shook my head annoyed and leaned forward. "You want to know what my problem is? ... I hate my supposed friends and I hate my mom. Living life lately has felt pointless and the only comforting thought that I have is I could be flying down the highway at ninety miles and hour and knowing how easily I could end it with a slight jerk of a wheel." he stares at me. "So, you can keep trying to force me into this *I gesture around the room* life so I don't keep feeling these emotions. I don't feel anything anymore and you wanna know the best part? I don't even care." dad looks away from me. "Maybe I'll end up like mom, it is your lifestyle, after all, that caused her to be where she is now, why she's so hooked on drugs! Why she only ever cares about getting high rather than her own daughter! You ruined mom and you will end up being the one who kills her."

Dad points at me. "You know that the accident is why she's that way, not me. She was prescribed the pills and she just let them get the best of her." I force a chuckle.

"Yeah, that's how it started but this life is what made her keep going back to them. Your lifestyle even drove her to drink! I mean, come on, think about it! If mom never met you then she'd never have gotten so messed up."

"Look, kid, I know I wasn't around much as I should've been because of work... I didn't realize how much that affects someone until now. That's why I try so hard with you. This is something I've been struggling with too. This life is life and people suck and the only people you can depend on is yourself. It's something I've come to realize myself. *looks at his phone* Let's drop this for now. Your Aunt Amalia's flight should be landing soon. You want to go pick her up?"

I took a breather before changing into sweats and grabbed my keys. 'Maybe dad's right. Maybe my issues are because of him. He almost made me kill dad a-and...' I shake my head. 'Dad said... god! How could I let him in like that? How could I have been so weak? What is wrong with me?!' I sniffled and wiped my eyes with one hand as I steered with the other.