A/N: Okay, so, for this one, italics are flashbacks. Kay, that's all! :3
The hardest part is how happy he looks.
Louis watches Harry and his girlfriend. It's stupid. He's gay. At least, that's what he told Louis. And he did some very not straight things with him too. So watching him like this, happy with a girl, it hurts. It really, really hurts.
He wonders if that was all a lie. If their whole relationship was complete crap. But if it was, why would he keep it a secret? Louis groans, running a hand through his hair. He wishes it wasn't Harry Styles he was obsessing over.
Niall taps him. "Louis? What's wrong? You're making noises."
Louis sighs. He wishes things could just go back how they used to be. "It's nothing."
* * *
Harry laughs. "Lou, get off of me!"
Louis laughs too, kissing him again. Harry puts his hands in Louis's hair and pulls his head up to look at him. Harry smiles.
"I love you, Louis." Harry says.
"I love you more."
* * *
"Well, if it's nothing, why does it look like it's Harry?" Niall asks.
It's always Harry. That's what he wants to say. He wants to go over to him, grab him by the face and kiss him hard. Kiss him like they used to kiss. But he can't. And that makes it all hurt so much worse.
He sets his jaw, trying to keep himself from crying. "It's nothing." He says again.
* * *
They stand under the starlit sky, the moon just a sliver. The cold air hits their exposed skin and their breath can be seen; a soft mist. Their foreheads are pressed together and arms around each other, just being as close together as they can.
"You're my everything." Harry breathes, so quiet Louis can barely hear him against the wind.
Louis doesn't say anything. He couldn't say anything. He just kisses him, trying to put all the things he never said and never will say into the kiss. He tries to make it perfectly clear exactly what he's thinking.
* * *
Niall nods. "I'm just gonna go talk to Harry really quick, okay?"
"Okay." Louis says quietly.
He can't tear his eyes off Harry. Then, Harry kisses the girl and suddenly Louis can't take it anymore. He gets up and runs out of the room. He runs into the bathroom and sinks to the floor, head in his hands. He can't hold it in anymore.
His shoulders shake and tears run down his face. He presses his palms to his eyes. Why can't everything just be okay again?
* * *
"Don't worry, Lou." Harry says gently, brushing some hair out of his face. "It will be alright."
Louis rests his head in the crook of Harry's neck. He doesn't have the ability to talk without crying.
"Haz, I can't lose you." He says, his voice wet.
"You're not." Harry murmurs. "It's okay." He runs a hand through Louis's hair. "Everything will be okay."
* * *
"Lou?"
Louis looks up. His heart skips a beat. It's Harry. Harry starts to walk over to him but he trips, landing in Louis's lap.
"Oops." He says, smiling wryly.
"Hi." Louis says.
Harry gets out of his lap. "Look, Lou, I just need-"
"Haz, don't." Louis says, looking down.
"Louis, I need you to listen to me." Harry says. "I love you. I love you with my whole heart but Louis we can't. You know we can't."
Louis starts to cry again. "I know."
Their eyes meet and neither says anything for a minute. Harry puts a hand on his cheek and his eyes move to Louis's lips. He kisses him softly.
"I just need you to know," Harry says. "I will always love you, Louis."
"Me too." Louis breathes. "It just hurts."
"I know." Harry whispers. He kisses him again, softly and they stay like that for who knows how long.
<<666 words>>
A/N: Well, would you look at that? A longer one shot and the number is evil. Anygay, thanks for reading. Love you guys. :3.
