Niall, Harry, Liam and Zayn sit on the couch, talking. Louis sits on the edge of the couch, watching Harry. The way his lips move when he talks. The sound of his laugh. The bright green color of his eyes. How his nose is red from the slight cold. He wonders how soft his hair would be if he touched it.
He knows he shouldn't be thinking like this. He knows that he's supposed to be straight. He hates it, though, so only in his head he lets himself think these things. He also knows he especially shouldn't be thinking these things about Harry. He's his best friend. Best friends don't think like that, or at least, they're not supposed to.
Louis sighs, shifting. He tries to shake the thoughts from his head but it doesn't work. God, he wishes he didn't feel this way.
Then, Harry looks at him and their eyes meet. Louis swears his heart stops beating. His mouth goes dry and he's pretty sure he's lost half his blood volume. When Harry looks away, he shakes his head, trying to get back to normal.
He takes a shaky breath and swallows hard. Then he stands up, nearly falling over because he stands up too fast.
"Lou, where are you going?" Harry asks, leaning on the arm of the couch to look at him.
"Water." Louis says, squeezing his hands into fists and releasing them. He walks into the kitchen around the corner and leans against the counter, palms pressed against it, heads lowered.
He can't take it anymore. He wishes there were someway to fix it; to change the way he feels. He wants to slam his head against the counter just to feel something else. To feel something right.
"Lou?"
Louis lifts his head and turns around. Harry stands in the doorway, a concerned look at his face, hands at his side.
"Are you okay?" Harry asks.
That question. The unanswerable question. The question that Louis thinks about twenty four seven. Is he okay. And he doesn't know. But that's not an answer you're allowed to give to Harry Styles. Or most people, for that matter.
"I..."
Louis doesn't know what to say. What is he supposed to say? I'm in love with you Harry, but we're not allowed be gay so it doesn't matter. You can't just say things like that.
"Louis?" Harry says again, moving closer. "Lou, what's wrong?"
"I'm gay." Louis blurts out. "I'm gay and I'm not supposed to be and I'm in love with my best friend. That's what's wrong, Harry. That's what's wrong."
Harry furrows his eyebrows. "But...I'm your best friend."
Louis nods, slapping his hands to his side. "Yeah. I'm in love with you."
Harry doesn't say anything for a minute. "Louis, I-I don't know what to say."
"Pretend like I never said anything." Louis says. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have."
"Lou, I'm in love with you too." Harry says.
Louis doesn't wait another second. He walks across the room and puts his hands on Harry's face, kissing him. Harry kisses him back. Louis presses their foreheads together.
"I love you, Louis." Harry murmurs. "And I don't care if you're not supposed to be, I'm pretty glad you're gay."
Louis chuckles. "Yeah. Me too." And he kisses him again.
<<551 words>>
A/N: Can we all agree that Louis Tomlinson is hot? Because SOMEHOW my friend thinks he's not. I mean, I'm not in love with him or anything but he's undeniably hot. So sorry. Ignore me. Anygay, love you guys. Thanks for reading! <3.
