𝒊'𝒍𝒍 𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒕..

On my knees, begging..

my love do  you know the reason why I look up to the sky? do you know why i keep smiling when i see a beautiful sunset ? do you know why i glance at the moon everynight when  it shows in the middle of a billion stars? bc all remind me of you, the moon when it shines reminds me of your energy around me, the sunset reminds me of the beauty of your smile, everything remind me of you, suddenly all the songs were about you for some reason, I looked up to the window all i see the is the pretty full moon, I knew it, it's 1am..
1am, deepest thoughts about you, you live in my head rent free, can you please me pay for me, not cash, but with love, affection and care, my hopes are falling day by day, oh god i wish you never talked to me,or never drop an eye on me, thinking of you with another one lights up the hidden jealousy inside me, do the word love is enough for what i'm feeling? i guess not, i'm literally drowning, breaking into pieces each piece think about you hah you think i'll ever look at someone else ? you insane because you're the only one i see, i don't give a fuck about anyone but you. i hate begging but i beg you to stay by my side, i hate begging but i beg to open up your heart and to open your eyes and see that i'm the one who understands you and i'm being here around all the time to just caught your attention and to see me, the perfect girl for you, but still don't know if i'm the one for you or not
i'm bleeding inside, i'm so bleu, really can't help but letting my tears fall down to wet my face, should i cry to make everyone believe that i'm sad ? or should i cut veins off and make everyone okay? that's the real question, tired to be the second choice, tired to be the least favourite, tired of faking happiness while hah i'm not happy at all ! hope you see what i'm throught