Doah Oneshots

10.

tw: abuse

"Noah why can't you just stay away!" I was pacing back and forth in my bedroom as Noah tried to grab my hand and pull me closer.

"I don't want anyone else but you Dixie." He said sternly. He grasped my hand slightly before I quickly pulled it away.

Tears stung eyes. I couldn't look at him in his eyes. "There are so many other girls than me, ones who actually have their life put together and are beautiful. I cant keep ruining your reputation. You have a great life to live" At this point I let the tears flow and started sobbing.

Let's start from the beginning:

Noah and I had been dating for a while, your classic bad boy and nerd love story. The bad boy falls for the nerd and they live happily ever after, but that wasn't the case.

I wasn't your average nerd, yeah I kept up with my grades but I had a tough life. This made it harder for me to commit to things.

My father secretly abused me and swore he would kill me if I told anyone.

My mom died giving birth to me, that's the reason my father abused me, he told me everyday of my life that it was my fault she died.

I had an older sister, she was like my mom growing up. She was always there to support me, she was my should to cry on.

My life was a living shit hole in middle school. I always skipped class because of how much pain I would be in and I never did my work. I was just grateful I passed middle school.

Once freshman year started, I wanted to focus on myself. My dad had died of an overdose on my birthday, aka the worst day of his life. I then moved in with my sister into her small studio apartment by her college.

She didn't have a lot of money but I was just grateful she took me in. I slept on the couch that was in a small office that she converted to my room.

Life was finally getting better for me, I was going to start fresh, get my life together. Get my grades up. Finally be happy.

I was so wrong.

Yes, I was the smartest kid in our grade, but I got bullied constantly for the way I looked. I would open my locker to find words written all over.

I was skin and bone and my clothes weren't the newest but it didn't really matter until people called me out for it.

I would eat lunch somewhere alone to avoid humiliation. The only friend I had was my sister and I would go home everyday and cry in her arms for hours.

Once senior year started it was like every other year. I was getting bullied 24/7. I was used to it but it took a toll on my mental health. My life sucked. 

My sister has kicked me out as it was an order from her toxic boyfriend. He said I was a waste of space and ruined everything and if she didn't kick me out he would leave her.

She loved him more than me. She got caught in his trance. So she kicked me out. I took my things in a small backpack and left. I had no where to go. No friends, no family, nobody.

Nobody to care for me, nobody to love me.

I'm the beginning of senior year I made a friend, Addison. I had known her since freshman year but I never got the chance to actually get to know her.

She surprisingly took me in, her family loved me and I was finally somewhat happy. I got new things and I had a "family" that I hoped loved me.

2 months into the year I got asked to tutor Noah, the most popular and hottest person in the school. Your typical fuckboy.

I was surprised that he would agree, especially since he had been hated me since freshman year. I agreed because I had nothing better to do.

After weeks of tutoring, we ended up getting really close. I considered him my best friend. He was my new shoulder to cry on. I easily opened up to him about my past and he was accepting.

He would ignore his friends and hang out with me. I never realized how much he cared about me. I felt guilty because his friends already hated me but I knew Noah didn't care.

He would spend all his free time with me, even when his friends got annoyed. I also stopped getting bullied but that didn't mean they liked me.

I would still get snarky remarks here and there when Noah wasn't with me. But when he was, no one said anything.

At first I kept wondering why he was being so nice to me and always stuck by my side. No one ever really did that. The thought soon left my mind as I let my heart take over.

It wasn't until a few months ago that Noah and I got flirty with each other with occasional cuddling whenever I had a breakdown.

He finally told me he liked me after a few weeks to find out I had fallen for him too. It was a dream come true, I was truly happy with Noah.

Until I couldn't take it. People soon found out about us being more than friends and I would hear the word spread.

I would be in the bathroom and hear girls talking about me and how stupid Noah was and what he saw in me.

I would shrug it off but it soon came to a point where I couldn't take it anymore and I decided it was best to break things off with him.

He could do so much better and I was ruining his reputation.

"Dixie...I don't care about my reputation, I would leave everything for you." I looked down at the floor silent.

I had nothing to give him. If he left everything for me he would regret it. I couldn't let him. I wouldn't. I was useless and if I broke things off with him he would find someone better in no time.

"Dixie please say something." He tried to grab my waist but I moved away.

"It's just best if you leave, I'm not good for you." I choked on my last words as tears slipped out.

"Dixie, you don't mean that. I cant just leave you it's not that simple!" He slightly yells which makes me flinch slightly not out of fear but of shock.

"What do you mean it's not that simple! I'm not special! Why me?" His eyes were glossy as he came closer to me.

"I can't leave you because I love you Dixie!" He yelled back unexpectedly which caused us both to calm down.

"Y-you what?" I looked into his eyes as tears stopped falling down mine. I never was loved before. I had never felt loved before. I never knew how to love.

"I love you." He came closer to me and grabbed my by waist, this time I didn't pull away.

"That's why I can't leave you. I love you Dixie. I love everything about you. I'm so madly in love with you." He said before he closed the gap between us.

As our lips collided, it felt like no other kiss we shared. It was filled with passion and love.

I pulled away minutes after and connected our foreheads. We both were out of breathe and it seemed like Noah would never let me go.

"I...I love you too Noah. But that's why I need you to leave." He looked at me shocked.

It was so hard for me. He just confessed he's in love with me and I did too. I finally found someone who made me happy and who genuinely cared.

I know you may me thinking, Dixie, how could you be so stupid? After everything you have been through?

The truth is I don't deserve Noah. He shouldn't be punished to be with someone like me.

It's like the saying "if you love someone you let them go." And that's exactly what I needed Noah to do.

"If you truly love me Noah, I..I need you to let me go."

A/N: oop- sorry not sorry