follow me// larry + ziam (and a side of niall)

9: Zayn

SMUT WARNING SMUT WARNING

Zayn felt sick to his stomach when he mulled over everything that had happened. It didn't really hit him that he'd kissed his best friend until hours later whilst watching Atypical. He really prayed that this didn't fuck up everything they had, so he promised to himself that he wouldn't act any differently. 

The one secret he kept all to himself (besides the whole liking guys thing), was his love for making music. His heart yearned to sing, but he was embarrassed so he stowed his instruments in his closet. 

His laptop sat open on his bed while he was cross legged holding an electric guitar. A small notebook and pencil laid flat against the comforter, and Zayn picked up where he'd last left off on his songwriting. He had a solid chorus, but the intro was the thing that stumped him. Eventually, he just thought about Liam and what was happening.

"We don't define each other." He hummed to himself. "Stand on your own, be a pillar." Zayn scribbled in the notebook, piecing together lyrics and ideas. He pulled up garageband and recorded the few chords he had for the song, before turning back to the lyrics. 

"Lay on my pillow, ain't fairly new to each other," He sang, "Call you my lover, drinks to my liver, I cry now a river full of tears." He added a high note at the end, and closed his notebook satisfied with the progress. Unfortunately, he started thinking about Liam again. Would he go to the party? Is he upset? Should I call him? It's been a few hours. He pulled out his phone, quickly finding Liam's contact and clicking it.

"Hello?"

"Hey Li--"

"Just kidding! It's not really me, just my voicemail. Leave a message and I'll get back to you!" The prerecorded voice said. Zayn sighed but waited for the beep.

"Hey Li, it was weird hearing your voicemail message, you always pick up on the first time! That's not why I called though," Zayn nervously chuckled, "Just wanted to check in and see how you're doing. I hope everything's okay. Anyways, yeah, call me back. Bye." He hung up and threw his phone hard into his pillow with a huff. 

"I need to get wasted tonight." He mumbled to himself. 

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Ava Lancaster's house was huge, even that was an understatement. And he didn't have Liam there to boggle over it with. Zayn was never a party drinker, he had good sense and understood that it's never a good idea to get black out drunk at a party full of high school kids. But tonight was an exception. He spotted Harry Styles, a fellow senior who he was kinda sort of friends with. Close enough to go say hello and make himself seem social.

"Vas happenin Harreh!" He faked enthusiasm and walked over to the tall brunette and his friend Niall.

"Zayn! How are you mate?" Harry bro hugged the raven haired boy.

"Pretty good, pretty good. what about you?" He nodded and stuffed his hands into his jean pockets.

"Good as well!" Harry replied "Here for the booze and good company." He elbowed Niall in the ribs.

"Hi Niall, what's up?" Zayn politely asked. 

"Nothing much, where's your plus one?" Niall looked around briefly.

"He, uh, wasn't feeling good tonight." Zayn felt his face drop, once again thinking about Liam.

"I'm sorry to hear that." Harry offered.

"Thanks. Cheers mate, I'm gonna go get drunk." Zayn saluted them before walking away from the two boys. He made his way into the kitchen to get some alcohol, and after that, he didn't remember a single thing.