absolution.

the end. (the beginning?)

cw: several references to past abuse/manipulation, exile, war, and deaths; blood, actual graphic death by being beat by a potato, implied injuries/scars; excessive cursing; basically the dream smp and its lore itself

(honestly this is just a recap of tommy's 3rd canon death, just skip to the end where it says "and the server glitches" if you'd like, because that's where things change

this is also like a preview to how i write aha)

if there's anything else, please comment!

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For what it's worth, Tommy never intended to lash out at Dream. Well, not yet, at least.

It's not entirely his fault! It's just. The cell -- Pandora's Vault -- was too quiet. Too stuffy, bland, hot, and so many other things. Obsidian blocks and their amethyst ravines aren't as fun to count when he keeps losing count at around five-hundred. The crackles and fizzles of lava can only fill so much of the silence, an overwhelming, oppressive thing that Tommy had found to immediately hate. (It reminds him of Dream and exile too much, the man in question only making his problem worse by being there.) Instead, the blond had tried to keep ranting about whatever he could, but he couldn't keep that up forever, even with the occasional comment from Dream. It was so bloody warm, too, being so close to the lava in a small space, but Tommy didn't care; as long as Dream was far away from him Tommy would be fine.

He'd have to be. He can't show weakness now, not when Dream had manipulated him so easily back then.

Looking back on it, the silence was probably what started to bundle his emotions and stress into a bomb, what made him reckless and stupid. When Dream had started talking about a "revive book" and what it entailed, Tommy wanted to stop thinking about it, because surely Dream didn't have that much power, right? Because despite Dream being an admin, despite Dream being an equal to Techno in power, he wasn't... Dream wasn't allowed to truly play God, was he?

Tommy wanted to stop thinking about it. The silence didn't help.

And after what Tommy could only assume was a few days -- or maybe weeks? Months? Years? Fuck, he didn't know and he never would -- the nightmares came back. Of the final control room despite having forgiven Eret; of the festival and fireworks and Tubbo and Pogtopia, Techno and his Withers as he laughed and laughed, war and colors and smoke and ignited trinitrotoluene, crimson leaking down his palms as he watched Phil kill Wilbur who died with a smile and then exile and Ghostbur and how he grew attached to his own abuser and--

Yeah.

(If Dream weren't there, always watching, waiting for something in the silence of the cell after Tommy can't talk anymore, then maybe Tommy wouldn't have minded as much.)

Either way, at least one of those problems had led him to snapping. Really, both he and Dream should've expected it. Tommy's always been a "problem child." Running off into danger when he was younger, constantly asking Techno to spar, causing the whole disc war and most, if not all of the other main incidents in the SMP. But Tommy knows that he really shouldn't have kept pushing Dream's buttons, more and more until the man fell over the edge. He knows the consequences first-hand -- the scars on his skin are enough to prove that.

Yet he did so anyway. Otherwise, he might've started to go insane.

"I'll get out eventually," Dream had begun, his voice slightly hoarse and muffled as he chews on a potato. He and Tommy were talking, standing in the middle of the cell. As much as Tommy would like to stay away from Dream forever, he had to put up a brave front and talk some day. "Because either you'll let me out or.. people will be dead. And that's the thing because yeah, you put me in here because you want me to --"