Always Red

Chapter Two

Veronica

Kara started the car, reversing so quickly that I grabbed on to my seat belt. "Did you call him?" she asked.

"I-­I can't. What if he doesn't want to talk to me?"

She stepped on the brakes, turning to look at me like I just spilled my brains on the floor of her car. "What?"

"I can't."

"Pussy," she clucked. She held out her hand, palm up. "Give me your phone."

"Kar, no. I can't explain it, okay? I-­I don't want to call him. I don't want to know."

"Know what?"

"That...that he doesn't want me. What if he doesn't answer? Or what if he does and then he hangs up? If there's a way that I can postpone it... It's ridiculous. I know. Don't you think I know that? I can't explain it." I was going to pull my hair out anytime now.

"You're fucking crazy, Ver, but you're lucky because I am too. All right. I'm sure Caleb's at Cameron's place. I mean, those two are practically married. No offense," she added.

I wanted to say "none taken," but I was a nervous wreck.

Caleb.

What if he doesn't want to see me?

Oh God.

"You okay there, sweetie?" Kara asked after a moment.

My heart was beating madly in my chest, my hands shaking with trepidation. Without warning, a whimper escaped my throat.

Kara let out a sigh and grabbed my hand, squeezing it. "You can do this. You want him back, don't you?"

The fear and nerves were wreaking havoc in my stomach and climbing up my throat. I felt choked up. I nodded.

"How much?"

"I... Very much," I sobbed. "I want him back very much."

She gave an approving nod. "Good. Make sure you tell him that. I mean, it's Lockhart. The guy would probably cut off his balls for you if you asked."

But I knew that feelings changed in the blink of an eye. What if his had? I wasn't an easy person to care for, and I tended to push away the people who tried to get close. I guessed a big part of me had been waiting for Caleb to disappoint me. Everyone in my life had. A long habit of being distrustful was hard to break...but I would for Caleb.

"All right, we're here," Kara said as she parked across from Cameron's place.

Sweat trickled down the side of my face, and I quickly wiped it away.

"Are you sure you don't want to go back to the apartment and change? I can do your makeup for you."

I shook my head. "I'm okay, Kar. Thanks."

She shrugged. "All I'm saying is that the hotter you look, the more he can't refuse. Boys are visual creatures, okay? They think with their dicks. It's not their fault; it's just the way they're made," she babbled on. "I mean, the more ammunition, the better, right?"

Oh God.

"Ver? Ver." She was snapping her fingers in my face. "Geez. Are you sure you can do this?"

I nodded.

"I'd go with you, but you know." She shrugged. "The devil lives in that house."

I nodded again. She gave me a pat on the back and pushed me out of the car. My legs felt wobbly as I walked to the door, my hand trembling as I rang the doorbell.