Throw It All Away [Zayn Malik]

Chapter 5: Deciding

Hello! Sorry for the semi-late update, seeing as I said I'd try to yesterday... Especially since it was Zaynie's birthday! Aww, I can't believe they're getting so old. *sobs in a corner* 

Anywho, school is back (ew), and so is the musical that I have rehearsal for every day. So... sorry about infrequency of updates, since I'm trying to juggle this, Human, and my collab story with @AlexandraJoy and @TogetherWeRise. 

In other big news, TMJ has reached over 100,000 reads! Which is absolutely insane, just in case you didn't realize. Thank you all so much, it means the world to know people like it! It also means to world to know people are liking the sequel just as much! 

SO... with that all being said, I guess you may all read on! Thank you for you comments on the last chapter, as always! I love to hear them! :) Thank you all again my lovely Kayanators! 

Zayn

            “I dunno mate, this tour is pretty big,” Louis says skeptically, twirling his phone in his hands. “I know how much you care about her and all, but this is huge for our careers.”

            He says it as if I don’t already know that. Of course I do, I mean, we are a band. Our career is one; every little thing just one of us does affects the whole group.

            Niall nods in agreement then. “If you still want to look for her when we get back, we’ll help you,” he offers. “Really. But we can’t miss out on this, it’s too big of a deal.” 

            Though I know I should be grateful for the thought, the fact that any of them are willing to still put up with me after everything, I still feel bitter. This tour isn’t just a big deal, it’s huge for us, but I can’t shake Dana from my mind, no matter how hard I try. 

            The boys and I have always been a team, always stuck together, especially when it’s needed most. But I guess the question here is which is more important: the tour, or Dana? 

            They’ve helped me all this time, agreed to lie for me and keep huge secrets. I owe it to them, to the band, to continue on this tour. We’ve had our three-month break; it’s time to get back to work, to do what I’m paid to do. 

            “Fine,” I finally mumble, looking away. “I’ll do the tour. I’m sorry; I know I’ve been really selfish lately with all this I just… Never mind, I’m just sorry.” 

            Harry, sitting beside me on the couch, gives my knee a gentle squeeze, showing me with his eyes that it’s for the best.

            I look over at Ben, who’s sitting at the dining room table, away from the rest of us. He’s not really doing or saying anything, just staring out the window. It doesn’t seem like he’s doing it dreamily or anything either, just simply staring, lost in thought.

            What about him? Don’t I also owe something to him, to find his sister that I took away from him? How can I choose between this lost, almost helpless boy, and my best mates and career?

            I made a promise to him. 

            “Actually Zayn,” Liam speaks up then, for the first time since the conversation started. “I think I may have found something to motivate you to go on the American tour.” 

            I frown along with the rest of the boys, wondering what he means. 

            “How do you mean?” Harry questions, voicing the thought on everybody’s mind.