Peter Griffin x Stan Smith

The Forbidden Sitcom

Peter Griffin was done with Quahog, Rhode Island. He'd had enough with his fake progressive, womanizing dog, Brian. He'd had enough of his stupid fugly children, Chris, Stewie, and Meg. Most of all, he'd had enough of his bitch wife, Lois. Lois was a nagging whore. There was only one solution other than homicide. He knew what he had to do.

•••

Stan Smith was home alone on a lazy Friday afternoon in Langley Falls, Virginia, apart from Roger. Roger was just upstairs doing gay alien shit like he always does. His babe wife Francine had taken their two kids (Steve & Hayley) and their German goldfish Klaus to the mall. Suddenly, he heard a knock at this back door (get it bc anal lmao). Upon opening it, he saw a face he thought he'd never see again.

"Peter!" was all he could utter out. This man was the only person Stan had ever loved. It hurt is heart to see him after so many years. After their soul-wrenching agreement that said they would never see each other again, for the sake of their families. Peter took a step inside, barely managing to fit his large American stomach through the door. All Stan could think about what was hung under that oversized fupa.

"Hey Stan. Been a while, hasn't it?" whispered Peter, taking another step towards the frozen Stan. "I missed you. I couldn't handle being without you. I need you right now, in the way I did long ago."

"P-peter..." murmured Stan. But he didn't have time to finish. In a split second, Peter had pushed stan onto the couch and they began to French kiss, CIA-takeover style. Within a few minutes, they were out of control, forgetting about their families and their old rules. In one quick motion, Stan picked Peter up and carried him up the stairs into the bed he had always felt alone in, despite Francine mere inches away each night. He didn't feel like that right now. All he felt was Peters dick in his mouth cause he had started doing that.

All of a sudden, two anguished yells filled the room, and Stan almost swallowed Peter's entire fucking chunky monkey due to fear. He recognised the women standing in the doorway. The two wives stood dumbfounded, ogling the scene. Which is why it was an extra bad time for Peter to cum. He also had the "Oh no oh no" peter noise, which is pretty funny if you've ever heard it in real life. Pantsless, both men ran to the wives. ;$&:

"Peter!" Yelled Lois. "How could you! What about me? What about Meg? Chris? Stewie?"

All Francine could do was stare at the two outed lovers. Then, Roger walked in. He giggled and he looked at the scene in front of him. "Now this is interesting!" He said. He waddled down stairs for some popcorn and booze because he's a canon alcoholic.

Stan and Peter began to explain once Roger returned. The wives listened to the tale of two young men on the East coast, connected by their racism and hatred for the Jews and gays. They learned of their secret romance, that continued until the night of Stan's wedding, when he and Peter agreed to never see each other again for the sake of their new families. How the two men had never stopped loving each other. Slowly, Lois and Francine began to see.

As it turns out, neither Lois or Francine were bad wives. Seth MacFarlane was just a raging misogynist who projected his incel funnyman beliefs into his comedy shows. With understanding smiles, Francine and Lois left the room, blessing Peter and Stan to have as much gay sex as possible.

The two lovers turned to each other, guiltless for the first time. Stan pulled Peter on top of him with a moan, and they did a bunch of anal for like a week straight. Later on, a movie would be made based off their romance, called Brokeback Mountain.

•••

Months later, Peter and Stan were living together in a cozy apartment in the Gay Man Capital of the USA (San Francisco). They still corresponded with their ex-wives who made each other casseroles all the time and scissored with each other sometimes.

Finally happy, Stan looked at his own bright eyes in their bathroom mirror. He almost didn't recognise himself because Peter's uncircumcised schlong made him so happy. Suddenly, his mood turned upside down, and he kneeled in front of the nearby toilet and vomited like a crazy amount of Fruity Pebbles. Was this possible? He wiped his mouth and turned towards the mirror again.

Sinking to his knees, he realized what had happened. A baby. What would he tell Peter?

THE END