i promise, i'm trying.

three.

yamaguchi pov.

everything goes silent. i can't remember where i am. it's too dark to see and my chest feels heavy, as if there's a thousand people pressing down on me.

they know. they know i deserve this. i should just let them take me. i should just let them drag me down. but for some reason i fight. everytime i inhale, it burns like a million fires engulfing me, but i can't give up. i need to get back to you.

"you're okay, i'm here. i'm right here, you'll be okay," i hear.

i blink open my eyes, black splotches appearing and disappearing everywhere, to be greeted by you.

"can you hear me? you're okay."

i open my mouth to respond but my migraine only intensifies, making me flinch.

"hold on, i'll be right back," you say as you get up. i let out a small whimper.
don't leave.

"i'll be right back," you repeat.

i lay on the bed, waiting for your return. missing the warmth and comfort from when you were hugging me moments prior.

oh, you're back.

you extend your arm to hand me something. water. i grab the glass with shakey hands. as i tilt my head back and close my eyes, drinking it, i didn't even realise how thirsty i truly was.

"thank you," i manage to say. "i'm okay now."

"are you sure?" you ask.

no.

"yes. just tired. can you lay with me?" i ask.

"of course."

we've been dating for almost half a year, but everytime you touch me it still makes my stomach do tiny flips, like a gymnast starts up, everytime. as we get comfortable in my bed, i want to ask you a question, but i keep it to myself. maybe one day i'll be able to ask you. maybe one day-

"goodnight, tadashi." my thoughts get interrupted. it's probably for the best.

"goodnight, tsukki." i respond.

i fall asleep in your arms.