Written In the Stars

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

It's been days since I left Steffy. I've kept to myself and have not really left my hotel room, and haven't spoken to anyone with the exception of a few vague texts that I sent to Wyatt.

I told her that I needed to think about this. This is a lot to ask of me. I don't know, if I could sit back and watch another man raise my child. If I am honest, it would really be another man raising both my children. I don't know how Steffy expects me not to be bitter and hurt over this. Steffy offered me the position of "Uncle" to the new baby. But she does not want me involved as the father. I don't think I could live with just being "Uncle Liam"

I feel my dream, slowly slipping away from my grasp. Despite, Steffy's hurtful request, I still want her and want our family. In retrospect, I understand where Steffy is coming from and why she has asked this of me, but it still does sting. I feel like a part of my heart is being ripped out. I know that I deserve all that comes my way. I regret taking it this far and for this long.

I want to be able to enjoy this pregnancy with Steffy, pamper her, love her, and be there for her. I didn't get to do it last time, and I do not want to regret not doing it this time.

I am still unsure of what to do. My stance hasn't change. I still want Steffy. I still want our family, but I don't know how I am going to get there. She has been so adamant about cutting me out of our child's life; I don't know how I will get her to understand that this is the wrong decision. We need to be together, not only for our sake, and our relationship, but for our family. Our children deserve to have two loving parents, being raised in a home together.

I feel like I am doomed no matter what path I take here. Do I willingly give up my chance to raise my child, raise Kelly with Steffy, and be their father? I don't want to be just the sperm donor. I would miss out on so much. If I do this, any shot that I have with her and truly reuniting our family would go out the window. If I miss out on this opportunity, there may not be another chance for us. But, Steffy would be happy. She would get what she wants, or what she thinks she wants. When I think of the possibilities for Steffy and our family, I feel at such peace. I know being with her is the right thing.

However, if I stand up and try to fight this, I may lose the only chance I have left in reuniting our family. If I push this, I know Steffy would probably understand, but she would probably resent me forever. She would never be happy, and I want to her to be happy. I just wish I could show her that I am in this.

There's no use in delaying this, I told Steffy I would give her an answer soon. This will be the toughest decision that I will make in my life. I am not sure if I am going to make the right decision, but I know that it has to be, and that if we are supposed to be it all will eventually work out.

I take my cell phone out and dial Steffy's number. She picks up after two rings.

"Liam," she says dryly.

"I need to see you, I've made a decision. Can we meet as soon as possible?"

"Of course."

"Do you want me to come there?" I ask.

"Uh, no, I will come to you. Give me an hour, and I'll be there. See you in a bit."

"See you then," I reply before hanging up the phone.

I rubbed my face with my hand, exhale and then sigh, "I really hope that I am making the right decision."