Turning Izuku Off And Back On Doesn't Work

Arson & Assault

It's your favorite author that's a Bakugo kinnie back at it again

Izuku's POV:

I raced from the streets into the bar, ducking behind ten counter.

"What did you do?" Mamagiri asked, sighing.

"I played with fire and got burned. There's an arson bitch behind me."

"Great."

At that a guy with blue fire burst in.

"Hi, what can I get you?"

"The little green bitch who went in here."

"Actually I am male but go off I guess." I used my voice changer to make my voice bounce against the walls, confusing the cremation boi. "What is your name?"

"Dabi." I began dying of laughter, and I left my hiding spot.

"Hon I could've chosen a better name! Azure! Flame! The Blue Dragon! And what is up with those staples!? You're begging for an infection! You know what, you're the newest child, I've adopted you, you'll never escape me. CHILDREN, WE GOT ANOTHER ONE!"

And Dabi kinda just stared at everyone like 'is this a normal occurrence' and everyone stared back like 'y e s'

"Wait wait wait, I have an associate named Toga. She... does my main business with me, I can't leave without her."

"Oh so you have a chosen sister! Alrighty, bring her on over."

"You clearly favor non villainous quirks. Hers is blood related."

"Quite frankly I'm offended that you think so little of me, I'm quirkless for crying out loud! Bring her over, I'd love to have a girl over here."

"A-alright. Why should I?"

"Because I can track you down and easily bring you back to nurture and care for you!" 

"I think he was looking for an answer as to the perks, and not an ominous threat."

"Oh! I feed you, there's a roof over your head, I don't really give a shit where you go as long as you're back or send a text before 12, but if you come back under the influence of anything, you'll be learning how 100% steel my cooking pans are."

"Uhm, ok..."

"Well why don't you go get your sweet little sister, Himiko must be home by now. She's worried for you, you know that right?"

"How did you.."

"I have my ways. Now be back here later today or tomorrow, or I'll find you, and I'll make you the best meal of your life."

So then Dabi left, to get his sister hopefully.

"Mama Izu strikes again."

"Huh?"

"Oh my god he's not even doing it in purpose please-"

"What do you mean?"

"You threatened him with a warm meal and a place to stay."

"And? He needed it! Much to skinny for a growing boy!"

"See! That's my point! You're a doting mother towards everyone."

"I am not!" 

"Hey mom?" Tomura snorted.

"What?"

"I lied. I don't have any moisturizer, or creams."

"Oh my god, that's it. Get on the goddamn motorcycle, we are buying the creams, and you're going for a spa day. Actually scratch that, we're doing that after my two new children arrive. Goodness knows Dabi needs it."

Until the very next day BUH BUH BUH BUH BUH BUH BUH WHEN A DUCK WALKED UP TO A LEMONADE STAND-

It was noon when the two arrived.

"Hiya! I'm Himiko Toga!"

"Hi there Toga! I'm Izuku!"

"Ooh~! I like you Midoriya! I just want to cut you up until you stop breathing~!"

"Please don't, multiple people will fall into existential crisis and then I have to deal with that and your dead body when I'm inevitably revived."

"Awh, I really want to taste your blood."

"You can, just not through that method."

"Really!? I haven't had good blood in weeks~!"

"Yeah, when I come back from school you can collect it!" Her eyes narrowed.

"Why would you be bleeding?"

"Bitches are haters, and they can stay jealous."

"You get bullied?" I snorted

"Now the funny part is you think I wouldn't."

She looked as if to ask 'And you guys don't do anything about it!?'

"They can't." I said.

"Yeah. He goes to ungodly measures to stop us from learning what school he goes to."

"Like what?"

"If any harm happens to any of the schools people, or teh school, or even if they figure out the school, they have to cook their own food, and they don't get AC or heating for a month."

"That's brutal." I rolled my eyes.

"That's necessary. They'll go to almost any lengths to protect me."

"Almost?"

"Those specific conditions are the best working. Nobody here can cook for their lives- well except Kurogiri."

"Ouch Izu."

"Suck a dick Tomura. Preferably Dabi's." The two mentioned decided it was time to discover new shades of red together.

"Well, I gotta get dinner started. Be nice! And no murder without me!"

"Alright!"

That's a wrap! Have a good morning, afternoon, or night and I'll see you next time!