sad 5sos imagines ☹

The child we lost l.h

Luke pushes the door open to the emergency room. You clench his hand and breathe through your mouth. The pain was almost unbearable but you couldn't help but smile at the thought that you were about to meet your son. Luke rushes you to the front desk and tries to stay calm but he's about to rip through his skin. He taps his foot and drums on the counter with his fingers. He gave the woman at the desk your information and she sent for a wheelchair. 

 Luke held your hand the whole way down the hallway to your room. He had a hard time keeping up but he managed. Luke helped you change into your gown and he helped you into the bed. You kept looking down at your swollen belly and rubbing it. It wasn't long before you get to meet your boy and you were excited, though you still felt something off. You couldn't shake the feeling. Despite the pain you were in, he seemed still. 

"Are you alright, babe?" Luke asks as he shovels ice chips into your mouth. 

"I'm fine," You say, "It just feels weird." He smiles and gives you a kiss on the head.

"It's probably normal, you've never done anything like this before." You shrug knowing he's probably right. 

The doctor comes into the room and says it's time to push. You immediately get nervous. You do as the doctor instructs and take deep breaths. A nurse stands at one side of you and Luke stands on the other side. He is holding your hand and coaching you like you guys had practiced. You push twice and look at him for encouragement.

"He's almost here, Y/N, just a few more pushes," You push again and the doctor announces that in one more push your son would be here. You push with all your might. You see them hold your son up in the air. The two nurses flock to the doctors aid. You look at Luke with a tear in your eye and a smile on your face but he looks concerned.

"What?" You ask Luke. He looks at you and furrows his eyebrows. 

"Why isn't he crying?" He asks. My head snaps to the doctor and nurses who are rushing out of the room with your child.  You are concerned and scared. Luke sits next to you and holds your hand. He puts his hand on your head and slowly moves it in attempt to calm you down. Not long after everyone left the room, a nurse came in. The same one that stood by your side.

"What's wrong with my baby?" You ask, you want nothing more than to hold him in your arms. After nine months of feeling his little feet kick you and telling him you can't wait to meet him. 

"I'm sorry to say but your son was still born," she said. I moved my hand to my mouth but tried to contain my sobs. You look at Luke and he does nothing to contain them. Tears fall down his face and his hands shake. "What is going to happen is you will get to hold him and see him for an hour but then we have to take him." you nodded slowly and she exited the room to get your son. 

Luke looked at you and put his forehead on mine. You stopped holding your sobs. you let them go. Warm tears fell down your cheeks and you started shaking. It wasn't long before a different nurse came in, wheeling a clear container. She wheeled it up next to you guys and gave you a warming smile before leaving into the hallway. You look into the container at your son. He looks like he's sleeping. He is wrapped comfortably in his blanket and his eyes are shut. You look at Luke and he looks back at you. Neither one of you will reach for him. You decide you want to hold him first. You sit up a little bit and pick up your son. 

The second you touch him you start crying again. You wish you had more time with him. You wish you could have seen what color his eyes were. You know they would have been big and blue just like his dad's. He laid in your arms and you held him close to you. What feels like forever goes by and you decide to pass him off to Luke. Your husband takes him in his arms and looks down at him. Tears cascade his cheeks and his lip quivers. 

"I was going to teach you how to play guitar," he said, you cry harder, "I got you a guitar and everything. It's little because you are little. I was going to have to wait until your hands were a little bigger," he brushed his hand against his face and started crying again. "You would've loved your uncles, they're crazy but they were excited to meet you. So was I." You cover your face with your hairs and you cry. That's all you can do right now is cry. "I could've taught you a lot of things," he says through sobs, "I love you buddy."

You begun thinking, what will we put on his tombstone if we haven't named him yet?

________________________________

hi guys! I just wanted to say that I am very glad you guys like the first one, but I can't really write a part 2, It's just supposed to end there lol. idk, request if you want !!