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@slut4sethcohen jacob last night when he punched **** ↳@themohawkguy sorry for wanting to protect you😀 ~lolll Next time don't get into a fight ur too pretty for that<3↳@theemmaross HAHAHHAA STOP ↳@slut4harrystyles BABE WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT ~ ...

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@slut4sethcohen jacob last night when he punched ****
@themohawkguy sorry for wanting to protect you😀
~lolll Next time don't get into a fight ur too pretty for that<3
@theemmaross HAHAHHAA STOP
@slut4harrystyles BABE WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT
~ ILL CALL U
@ilovekirbybuckets WAIT FOR ME TO CALL IZZY ANYWHORE THIS IS FUNNY


So recap of last night. Jacob and Matt got into a fight because I didn't wanna talk to him. I ended up running away when they got into a fight. Why? I got a panic attack. Xolo stopped them from fighting but Matt was fucked. Pretty sure he has a black eye. Jacob is fine. Seeing jacob get jealous was funny. But it was also kind of hot.

I realized last night that i liked Jacob. I don't want to tell him thought because it's to fucking fast to start a relationship. I called Izzy the next morning. It was Just xolo and i in his room. Jacob went to get breakfast with Peyton and Hannah.

I told Izzy everything that happened last night. "So what does that mean for you two!?"  Izzy said. "what do you mean?" I said "Briar cmon it's obvious Jacob liked you. Everyone knows this." Xolo said. "haha funny." "Bri we aren't kidding. I can tell and im not even in the same state as you." "It's obvious you like him to" xolo says "as a friend"  I say "Bri cmon you can't just push this away. It's time for you to move on. Finally go on a date. After everything you have been through you deserve it." Izzy said "and last night not drinking,not doing drugs, not doing anything was so hard for you especially after the fight it was obvious to me. It shows how far you have come." xolo says

they were right. I just wasn't mentally ready for anything. because of everythingI had been through. I'm not ready. or am i? I have no idea if i am.

"i just don't feel ready. I just got better. You guys still have to watch me take my medication. I am not better and I will never be better."  "Yes you are. You are just scared. You are scared of going downhill but you won't." izzy says "I don't know guys what if Jacob finds out everything from the past and realizes i'm so fucked up and that he deserves better." "He does that and i beat his ass. But he won't Jacob isn't that type of guy" xolo says. "take ur time with it but you tell Jacob if and when ur ready." izzy says "take things slow." xolo and izzy say at the same time as we burst out laughing.

I am going to go for it sooner or later. I personally just don't want jacob to know about my past. I was a horrible person. In every single way possible. I was horrible mentally, physically and emotionally.

it was so bad that xolo and izzy contacted my birth parents. I never spoke to them due to the fact that they kicked me out at 16. Why? not important right now.

Xolo and Izzy's family are my family they took me in. It was always me switching from place to place as if they were divorced. Who knows how things will go.

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