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Dear Namjoon,

the universe might be flawed, yet at least it has you, one who inspires others and makes us feel worthy of ourselves. i still remember how i used to cry and break down at your talks, get back with my face upward, and walk proudly due to your words which moved me and made me fearless.

i know this sounds extremely stupid, but I'm sorry, i've decided to give up. we may fall and get back up, but how many times? what if we are destined never to get up again? what if we're meant to be soiled?

you may wonder, "what is this little teenager even facing?"
frankly, a lot.

always remember that you are loved, cherished, and celebrated. your existence is divine, and never doubt it. the world is full of people who love you, and your presence brings happiness to them. despite the challenges i face in my surroundings, i believe in your inherent worth and value. as a misfit to society and a shame to people related to me, i've decided not to be a burden to be carried by them unwillingly.

i'm sorry, i give up. yet, thanks for making my life better and for being there with me when i wanted comfort. i might be a disgrace for this whole concept of loving ourselves, but unless a door for me opens, i'll never find a way out of this hell.

with love,
ara


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