Control.

"Nothing."

You spent the rest of the day getting ready, thankfully you didn't have any missions. Busted out every shaving cream, exfoliator and moisturiser you owned. You're not 100% sure what's going to happen tonight but you want to be prepared.

It's almost five o'clock before you realise Bucky never told you what time he was coming over. Or were you supposed to go over to his room? Shit. You didn't really think this through.

It's okay, deep breaths.

You decide to walk down to the kitchen, get some food. Did you eat today? You're not sure. You're completely wrapped in thought, barely noticing your surroundings.

You stop yourself by the massive painting on the wall. You always did love it. It showed an illustration of the Final War, the good guys vs the bad guys AKA Thanos.
The Original Six were at the front of the army. Bucky was drawn just a little behind Steve Rogers. Not that you were intentionally looking for him.

You knew the story by heart, of course. After Tony cleverly stole the stones from Thanos, Wanda used her magic to link the army together so each one of them could take a little bit of the power from the stones. At the end, everyone was shaken up, but the plan worked.

"I always hated that painting." Natasha chuckles behind you making you jump.

"Oh, hi." You greet her, embarrassed.

She was always sweet to you and you considered her a friend, but a hint of pain never seemed to leave her eyes.

"Hi, you. Haven't seen you in a while." She walked to the kitchen with you. She wears her casual clothes, black jeans and a lilac blouse, her red hair flowing freely on her back.

"Yeah, I haven't been assigned many missions lately and I mostly stay in my room." You laugh awkwardly. For some reason, you found it very easy to open up with her.

"Tony mentioned you've been struggling with the pressure of the job lately. Did you find a way to relax yet?" She sits down at the kitchen bar, signalling at you to take the other stool.

"Yes." You reply. "No. I mean, I'm not sure yet."
Natasha raised an eyebrow, a curious smile on her face.

"Uhh... it's complicated." You lower your head into your hands.

"Okay, it's five o'clock and I sense this conversation needs a drink." Nat struts over to the drink cart and makes you both a cocktail.

And just like that, you spilled everything to the spy. Told her all about your anxiety and Bucky's proposal and your plan - well, your half-plan - to see it through.

She didn't say a word, listening to you attentively. When you finished, she tilted her head.

"It makes sense. You guys are kinda complete opposites."
"What do you mean?" You slurp on your drink. The more you drank, the better it tasted.

"Well, Bucky's tormented with the memories of his past, while you can't remember yours. He spent so much time unable to control himself that now he loves being in total control of everything. And you spend all your time controlling herself and your gift so the thought of letting go is terrifying but exciting."

You blink several times at her. Jesus, she got you down to a T. You'd never get used to people calling your magic a "gift". Is it truly a gift if you can't understand it?

"You're good." You mumble. Natasha smiled at you but then she suddenly becomes very serious.

"When I got-... When Steve brought me back," she stammered a little bit and brushed her hair from her face. "I thought I could just keep pushing my emotions down and move on but it wasn't as easy anymore."