Bandaged Hearts

Chapter 30

"I'm so sorry."

Silence douses the entire front yard of Scepter 4's building, the tension so tight that a spoon could cut through it. The pain continues to rip at my body, deafening out my senses and leaving me completely vulnerable. My head feels foggy and heavy, the weight keeping me bent over. The tears and sobs never stop, time seeming to freeze in order to taunt me for my loss. I hate it. I hate every minute of it.

A hand snaps me from my grieving state, body flinching away violently. I snap my gaze to the hand and then up to the body the hand is connected to. My frown only deepens and my eyes squint in sadness.

"Rikio..." I whisper hoarsely to the large man.

His lips are drawn downward, tear streaks glued to his tan skin. I can't see his eyes clearly from behind his classic purple shades, but I know there must be a lot of pain swimming around in them. He sniffs up a sniffle.

"Come on, (y/n)... We need to go..." he says softly.

I grit my teeth, heart screaming to stay next to Yata's still body like a loyal puppy.

"No!" I yell, tearing my shoulder away from the blonde man's large hand.

He seems to grimace, dropping his hand to his side.

"(Y/n)..."

"Shut up! I'm not leaving him again!"

Rikio lets out a sigh as I turn my body to face the fallen red clansman.

"I... I know it hurts... He was... He was a friend..."

"He was more than that," I murmur. "He was family to HOMRA and..." I swallow hard. "He meant more to me than the world had ever meant."

My arms wrap themselves around my stomach, cradling the jittering breathing that scatters all throughout my form, as I start curling back into myself. The never ending tears continue to spill out, vision growing blurry again.
Rikio lets out a sympathetic sigh, kneeling down next to me.

"Yatagarasu wouldn't want you to be sad about this. As long as you were safe, that's all that mattered to our hard headed vanguard."

"I know but-" I choke back an ugly sob. "It's because of me he's... he's...!"

I can't bring myself to say it, breaking down for what seems to be the fiftieth time today. Those vulnerable sobs drip from my lips, one hand racing to cover them up from the ears of the world and its judgemental mind. My eyes clamp shut with tear drops pinched between them, that stinging sensation keeping me grounded to reality's pain. With as much willpower as I can muster, I drown out the world's noises.

I want to disappear. Run away from the pain. But I can't. The bullet to the chest has already caused my heart to shatter into thousands if not millions of pieces. I've lost... I know it.

"(Y-Y/n)...?"

I snap my exhausted eyes up to the owner of the groggy voice that rasped my name. I lock eyes with tired hazel orbs that stare at me. My (e/c) eyes widen in shock, a breath hitching in my throat. Tears begin to pool once again, but they're not sorrowful droplets. They're ones of relief. Those drops finally tip over the lids and begin moistening the ground again.

"H-Hey! D-D-Don't cry-!" he rasps

Clothes shuffle, signalling that he's trying to sit up. I lunge forward with open arms and embrace the vanguard back down to the ground. He lets out a grunt from the impact. I bury my face into the crook of his neck, crying softly into his shoulder.

"I thought I lost you..." I weep, hugging his body tight to mine.

I can feel his body stiffen up, arms slowly wrapping around my waist. They lay there limply but it's very comforting. I nuzzle my head further into Yata's shoulder, letting the cries die down before lifting my head off of Yata. His gaze meets mine, a tired look glazing over his facial features. He raises a hand to my face, the palm surprisingly soft as I rub my cheek into it.