The Borderline

♡⃛ ─Finding out─⠀♡⃛

How can you love someone that you can't?

Love is more than just like. It's a word that expresses what your heart can't. And because when you love something you want to spend all your time doing that. But what if there was a line? A boundary that you can't pass because it'll hurt you.

As I wake up from my thoughts I come back to my consciousness and see the teacher talking.

"Now these are important things to remember for your final exam next month so please write this down on your notes" he yells.

Ugh, I hate doing school, especially math. I just have one more year of this and then I'll be out.

I was focusing on writing my notes when Jackson taps my shoulder.

"What do you want?" I whispered

"I forgot my pencil, can I borrow yours?"

I giggled at his silliness and pass him the extra one I had. He smiles as he saw the pencil, takes it, and goes back to his desk.

As we finish our last class I went to my locker to pick up my items when I see Jackson waiting beside my locker.

"I see you're waiting for someone?" I joked

"Haha, of course, I'm waiting for you so we can walk to your house."

"Ah yes and finish doing that science project but can you help me carry my bag, it's quite heavy?"

"Ugh, why are you so weak?" He teased as he wraps the bag on his back.

"Why are you so tall?!?"

"Okay enough let's get going!" He laughed

He walks towards the exit and I follow right behind him. I always have fun teasing him, I guess this is my way of flirting with him *smirks*

Again with his subtle actions that make me have butterflies in my stomach he makes me walk the inside of the road so I don't get hurt. I tried so hard not to let him notice that I smiled.

We were having a nice peaceful walk, talking about each other day when out of random he says

"So Rose I have something to ask you," he asked in a serious tone

My heart stopped for a second, he could ask me about anything but something inside of me feels like it's going to be bad.

"Yes...?" I gulped

"I have noticed that you have been acting a little..... Different lately."

Oh no, it better not be what I'm thinking!

"Different in what way?" I nervously asked

"Well you see, the more time I'm spending with you, the more I feel like you act more, nicer towards me, like the way you look at me when you talk and how you remember the little things I tell you."

"Yeah what about that?"

"There's nothing wrong with it however can I ask you....do you have a crush on me?"

I paused walking and started to turn red.

"W-what? Well, the t-thing is... Ummm"

I didn't know what to say. I wasn't expecting him to ask me. What was I supposed to say? 'Yes I do like you do you want to be my boyfriend?' then rejects me and our friendship is over? Or do I lie to him and have to bottle of my feelings and lie to him?

I think that I looked pale at this point by the shocking question he asked me. Jackson sees me that I wasn't saying anything and began to worry

"Rose, I'm sorry if I was too straightforward towards you" he comes closer to me.

"No, I'll just tell you when we get back home" I quickly changed the convo and speed-walked trying not to embarrass myself.

I thought that going home he was going to forget about it however while I was making the snacks I had the urge to just get it all out since I have been already exposed.

I bring the snacks to the living room and place them on the table. Jackson quickly takes a ginger ale and starts to eat the chips.

"Haha, I brought you another ginger ale since you always ask for seconds" I laugh.

"Wow, you know me that well!" He scoffs.

"Umm yeah so about that talk we had..."

"Rose if you don't feel comfortable in telling me, you don't have to tell me."

"No, I think it's best that you know the truth"

I take a seat on the couch beside him and get my thoughts ready. I have never thought about the day of actually confessing to him. But here we are, sitting in my living room, eating snacks everything can change right here. Right now. With just a couple of words and it would be the best or worse decision in my life. I take a deep breath before speaking

"U-umm so Jackson, so the real reason I have been acting like this is that I have feelings for you but it is of your sweet personality. The times I've spent with you made me feel safe and I can trust you with things. I don't have an older brother so you're basically like one to me but those feelings are still in me and I'm trying my best to control that and not to ruin our friendship. So I don't know if you feel the same way?'"

He tilts his head struggling to find some words.

"Well, the thing is, you are in the exact state I thought you were." He chuckles

"W-what for you mean?" I questioned

"I know that I'm your only guy friend you have so I knew that you would catch feelings for me. I figured it out by the way you talked to me and the small things reminded you. And it's nothing to Be ashamed of and our friendship won't change"

Wow was I that obvious? I mean he's not wrong. He is my only guy friend and of course, at some point, I would have feelings for him but why would he ask me if I liked him?

"Wait so did you ask because you have a crush on me?"

I thought to ask him because it was sorta suspicious.

"Umm no I don't have a crush on you I just asked because I was curious. Don't get me wrong I love hanging out with you but I don't feel the same way"

"Oh, I see. No, it's okay I get it"

For a moment I have thought it was true however parts of me think that he's lying. But it's not worth debating about it.

"Well, I'm glad that we can still be friends right?" I said trying not to make things awkward.

"Of course, thank you for telling me the truth." he smiles as he takes a sip of his ginger ale.

I was kinda glad that we had this conversation however now that I have been exposed and he knows my intentions. Now it's going to be weird that he knows about everything. Well, at least we got it figured out. Sort of, the problem is trying to find the balance in treating him as a friend and him as my crush. What am I going to do!?!