a lot of people ask about my name
well if you want to know the details, this is how it goes.
my parents, unitardo and Francis, were expecting a boy. they said that they loved the name Fernando because it goes way back in our family's history. it was my great great great great great uncle's favorite Taco Bell employee's name.
when they saw that I was a girl, they acted ecstatic. but, when they got out of the hospital, they put me in the dumpster in the back of the nearby Walmart. they left a note that said:
"this is Fernando marie. she is in this dumpster because she is pure trash. from, her parents."
I grew up with two stray cats that took me in. they were nice, and they even taught me the cat language. to this day I still speak more fluent cat than English.
so that is my backstory. not like you care anyways. now you get to read more about my fabulous life as a human being on this place called earth!!!
