Scared

Chapter 3

Paul was satisfied with his job. He loved it.

One day, while he was sitting in the doctors' lounge, looking at the therapy schedule for John, Brian had gotten close to him.

"Oh, Paul, here's the man I was searching for" he exclaimed and Paul looked up from his papers to look at him.

"Am I in trouble?" he asked immediately, gulping, but was met by Brian's laughing.

"No, no, quite the contrary" he said, still chuckling.

At that, the younger man raised his head a little, "Oh?"

"Yeah, I was here to talk about John and his therapy session. Wow. It's the first time I've ever seen him so cooperative" he said.

"What, really?"

"Yes. It's like a transformation. He went from a difficult, almost delusional boy to a completely new one"

Paul couldn't help the smile forming over his face.

It was true. He hadn't been his doctor for long, but John had changed immensely.

He had made huge improvements. Sure, there were still times where he was in a deep catatonic state, but the times he was more participating and active were growing as the days passed.

"Well, I leave you to it, then" said Brian, patting Paul's shoulder with a smile.

Paul smiled and walked away, ready to do something new he hoped would catch John's attention and interest.

When he entered the room, he smiled at the scene.

John was on Mimi's lap, looking very happy as he talked to her about something he couldn't hear.

Mimi was smiling and nodding along, one hand rubbing the boy's back.

When they heard the door close, John quickly spinned around to see who it was, making a happy little shriek at Paul's sight.

Paul chuckled, "Hello, John. How are you today?" he asked, walking closer to the bed and sitting on the chair in front of the desk.

John smiled and Paul felt his heart melt. He was so cute and sweet.

The way his eyes lit up at the simple thing that was looking at him and how dimples would form on his cheeks.

He was so gentle and radiant all the time.

"I'm okey dokey" cheered the boy, not looking away from his doctor.

Paul could feel a blush raise to his cheeks and he coughed a little, messing around with his papers. Anything to not look into those eyes.

He would only get lost in them.

"Alright, love, I have to go to work. We'll see each other at 4, okay?" said Mimi, getting up from the bed and gently kissing his forehead, before going away with a last sweet smile to Paul.

The two were left alone and Paul dared to look at John.

He was still sitting on the bed, slightly rocking back and forth. He looked like he was slowly sinking into a catatonic state.

The time spent with him had made him slowly learn every sign of a catatonic episode.

He would slowly start to dissociate. His eyes would start to look dull and distant. He would start to not answer when talked to, wouldn't engage in anything.

He would simply stay as still as humanly possible, even for long periods of time.

"What do you want to do, John?" asked Paul.

No answer.

"John?"

Still no answer.

John's look had gotten dull and sad.

Paul sighed, getting up.

It pained him a lot to see John so helpless.

"Johnny?" he said, kneeling down next to him and posing a hand on his shoulder.

John's body started shuddering, his breath coming out in harsh puffs.

His hand creeped up to his hair, a fist tangling in the soft auburn locks.

He tugged harshly, a whine escaping his rosy lips.

Paul, alarmed, quickly tugged his hand away, "Sweetie, no! Don't do that!"

John's big puppy eyes looked up at him, it was a heartbreaking sight.

Paul softly passed his hand in his hair, making soft shushing sounds.

He couldn't understand what happened. He had passed from being very excited and happy to be sad and almost nonverbal.

He wasn't in a catatonic state, though, because if he was, he wouldn't have reached out to him like that.

But something was surely wrong. Paul couldn't pinpoint it and the thing was upsetting him.

No matter how many times he had asked him, John wasn't answering.

Only shuddering sobs and whines were coming out of his mouth.

"I...I want Mimi" he whimpered, curling himself further. He put his head on his knees and stared at Paul intently.

Paul held eye contact, while also trying to comfort him.

"She's gonna return soon, John"

"Not true, it's only 10 in the morning and she won't be back until 4 this afternoon" whimpered the boy, fat tears blubbering from his eyes.

"I know, but if we do something, time will fly faster" answered Paul.

John's mood swings could be very brutal and sudden. Also his abandonment issues.

Mimi had explained to him how John was afraid to be left by everyone he loved.

He told Paul that John was starting to grow fond of him and he wouldn't stop talking about all the good things Paul was making him do at therapy.

Paul was very proud of the improvements and also he couldn't deny he was growing fond of the auburn haired one.

No, he wouldn't leave him. He wouldn't fail him. He would make him feel happy.

John hesitantly nodded, uncurling himself slightly and letting Paul see his face more clearly.

"Can you make a smile? I want you to show me the biggest smile you can do" said the dark haired man, softly prodding one of his cheeks. He was so surprised at the smootheness of his skin.

It was like touching a little child's cheek.

John slowly smiled, the smile growing more and more, until he was giggling.

"C'mon, let's see what we can do, okay?" gently said Paul, helping him up.

He sniffled, rubbing his eye from tears and getting up.

With a soft squeeze of the hand, Paul walked him to the table with the assortment of activities.

"Oh, I want to listen to this!" shrieked John, holding up a record.

It was Elvis's Jailhouse Rock. Paul liked it, and was surprised to see John liking it too.

"You like Elvis?"
"I love Elvis! He's so cool" said John, bouncing on his feet from the excitement.

Paul put the record on the turntable, delicately putting down the needle and seeing John sit himself down on the carpet in front of it.

He looked like a child on Christmas Day, he was sitting legs crossed, with his elbows on his knees and his head propped up by both hands, singing along with the songs.

Paul, sitting over the desk, was watching him with a smile and a warm feeling in his heart, noting every emotion and reaction of John regarding music stimulation, leaving for John's happy carefree smiles.