Dark Kingdom

Being Secretive

 My mom told me about the day I was born once. It was around the same time my mother and father had their fight. Not the one where he asked why I was so sickly. Unfortunately it was ten times worse than that. I block out thoughts of it and focus on my mother's calm voice as she recounted the story of my birth instead.

 "It was mid-morning,which is no surprise for you have always been a sunny child, but the birth wasrather hard. Not your fault, these things happen, we were afraid we would loseyou though and I had already grown so fond of you. You'd kick your little legslike you were ready to get out the crib and face the world. You were palethough and starting to get cold."

    My mom stopped, taking a deep swallow of breath, like it was hard to continue.

Then she cleared her throat though and took my hand lovingly. "So I wrapped you up in blankets and held you."

"Did it work, did it warm me?" I ask.

"Yes."

I smiled but then a thought occurs to me.

"But I'm still sick sometimes."

"Yes, and just like then I will hold you until you feel better."

  I wake up, wishing that were still true,and she was squeezing me tight and cuddling me as I sleep.

 I am alone though, and the events of last night come back to me in vivid detail, making me jolt up out of bed. I rush to my closet, wishing I had some kind of bag.

    Thinking it over I realize I have an extra sheet that I can tie. So, I zip out of the room as quietly as I can, hoping Edie and the others are not awake yet. The food from last night is still there and avoiding the meats I try to find things that won't spoil, putting it in the sheet and then tying it.

 Satisfied it'll stay tightly snug; I realize I don't want to go in my nightie, and I'd have to find something to wear that I won't need help getting on.

    Translation, no complicated suffocating dresses. I have none that aren't like that though. I silently curse. There was a small servant's room that I had never occupied but perhaps someone a long time ago had and left something behind?

I walk briskly over to the small door.

"What are you doing?" Edie's voice asks from behind me.

Crap. My eyes widen as I try to think of an excuse. I turn toward her with as much as a bored expression as I can muster.

"I uh-was waiting on you to wake. Was going to check out this room since I'd never been in it before."

 "There's nothing spectacular about a servants room trust me, I was curious once to. They're small and plain and that's about it. I'll go wake Sophine and Ivana up so they can help you dress and do your hair. We have to make an appearance today. You know how court is." Ender says with a roll of her eyes.

I nod and try not to look back at the room as I go back into my own and wait at my vanity, peering in the mirror it's hard not to notice the dark circles under my eyes. I look away quickly.

 Ivana comes in and gets to work brushing my hair, she braids it in a elegant braid before tying it up as Sophine picks out what dress I should wear. Swooning over all of them.

"I swear they just keep getting better and better!" Sophine exclaims.

"Pick a plain one. I'm not trying to impress anyone." I tell her. "The dark blue is fine." I say, thinking about how if I was really going to go in the forest, I did not want to be wearing white.

Sophine looks like she wants to argue but instead grabs the one I wanted and lays it down on my unmade bed.

 "We probably should have dressed you before doing your hair." Ivana mutters.

"It's fine, I'll step into it."

I go toward Sophine and she helps me get into before trying and latching the back for me.

"Would you like some makeup on?" Ivana asks.

The answer should be yes with the way I was looking but I wanted to look common when I snuck out of here in hopefully an old ratty gown. If not, the blue I wear would show that I was a lady, but I didn't want to draw attention with makeup. Better to look sickly then pretty when traveling alone.

"I'm not in the mood to hide myself today." I say.

Ivana nods and without saying another word stands from where she was sitting and smooths out last night's dress that she still wears.

"Shall we head out then?" Ivana asks a moment later and I nod, trying not to feel guilty.