Her Last Words |✔

Part 1

Sitting on a bench in my backyard I took a deep breath.
One week, it has been a whole week since she was taken from me, since I last touched her, since I last heard her musical voice.

Numb, that's the only thing I have felt for last one week. I mean since you are little you have seen and you know that one day you will find a partner, a person just made for you, then you grow up and start dating in the hopes of finding that 'the one' person and after all of this fortunately you find that person. It's possible some find that person without dating, or some people don't find them at all.

But I found that person, I married that person. My soul mate. My Ella.

And now she's gone.

It hurts, it hurts so bad that I wonder how can I breath.
I looked at my lap were a envelope lay there. Ella's lawyer had given me this today after her funeral. He said Ella had instructed him to give this envelopes to me at her funeral.

I smirked in disbelief. This is something Ella would do. God the silence in the house is giving me anxiety. I leaned back on the bench and looked up at the sky. I haven't shed a tear yet. I don't know why, but I couldn't. I have been on auto-pilot for last whole week, going through motions.

I looked at the night sky wondering how many people like me are out there in world, missing there special persons, looking at the sky wondering why they have been left behind, or for which crime they are getting punished like this.

I looked down in my lap again, and picked up the envelope on which 'To my darling hubby' was written in bold script.
I wonder when she had written this letter.

I remember the day when she told me about the cancer. Bloody Cancer. I felt like I had been punched in the gut. Doctors had said that the cancer is in last stage and they can't do anything and that my Ella only had six months to live. Six months only.

Ella didn't wanted to be confined to hospital bed in her last months of life. So she took her treatment but refused to be admitted in hospital. I wanted to oppose and I did, but she told me that its her decision and to respect it. And I did respect her decision because as much as I wanted to snarl and growl I can't because it was about her life and she have full right to decide.

I was strong or I tried to be strong because I wanted to support her and I did. But that strong facade has dropped and the man behind that facade feels utterly defeated.

Shaking those thoughts I started to open the envelope, after opening it l pulled the two papered letter out and prepared myself to read the last words from my Ella.

Dear, Benjamin
              So, I will start with the cliche dialogue,  I mean Ben if  you are reading this letter that means I am dead.

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